Silent Screams.Booming Words.

"Power Shift"-Playlist

2010-01-19T07:51:00.000-05:00

"Transformed"-Playlist

2010-01-11T02:18:00.004-05:00

This installment was inspired by the following songs:

"Transformed"

2010-01-11T02:18:00.001-05:00

It’d been only four days since John walked out on Alex and she kept dreaming of it like it was just yesterday. In her dreams she willed herself to say it. To say that she loved John more than Jacques, or even more, but she couldn’t. She couldn’t lie to herself, how was she supposed to lie to John just to keep him? No. It wasn’t right. Even if she was able to say it and mean it, she’d still have lost him because of everything she put him through. It was her fault he almost died. It was her fault that he had a mark on his back. He even looked past the devious vampire that wanted to kill him, but John honestly couldn’t handle the fact that she had three personalities, and sadly, only 1 of them wanted him. She couldn’t blame him for leaving the way he did.

If it wasn’t for Trey she’d fall apart. He was a good friend and she never really thought of crossing that line with him, ever. She was grateful for his hospitality in letter her stay in his room. He even slept on the pullout couch. He was always looking after her. And how did she thank him? She would sneak out and go off to John’s dorm room and watch him. She didn’t know why she felt the need to still protect him, watch over him like some silent guardian, but she did, even if he didn’t want her there. A part of her ached to know if he knew she was there. She prayed for it. She wasn’t good for anyone, Trey felt a way about her that she couldn’t act on, she caused John pain, and Xander of course, he felt everything she felt and was probably going insane right now.

Alex turned in her sleep as the midday sun shone dimly through the heavy layer of curtains Trey used his star power to get. He tried his best to make it as dark as possible in his hotel suite, and Alex appreciated it. She tossed and turned again. She was dreaming again. John was screaming and she begged him to stay. The look in his eye and the sound of his voice still haunted her. She put that pain and anger there and it even followed her to her only place of sanity, her dreams. Those weren’t even immune. She rolled over once more as Trey walked into the room and stood in the doorway. He looked at her, observed her and sighed. His phone vibrated and Alex turned.

“I’m not here.” She mumbled. Trey shook his head in disapproval. He was baffled still by how she was able to hear his phone vibrate in his pocket. Trey answered the phone.

“Hey, Xander. No, she’s not with me. If I see her I’ll tell her you’re lookin’ for her. Yeah. Ok. Keep me posted.” He hung up and looked at Alex who was now sitting up and looking at him, almost snarling.

“I don’t know why you always ask him to keep you posted. You know everything. I’m right here.”

“Ok, since you have all this criticism on how I lie; how about you tell him that you’re not here when he calls?” Alex fell silent and hung her head. “Exactly, now let me do this. Plus if I don’t ask him to keep me posted he might suspect I’m lying. Wow, you being depressed has really messed you’re lyin’ game up Alex. I’m gonna need for you to get it together, I didn’t know that vampires got this sad.” He joked. Alex tossed a pillow at his head and tried to go back to sleep. All she wanted to do was sleep and write. She didn’t eat much and sleep made it hurt less.

After epically failing to go back to sleep without seeing John’s face, she decided that she needed to get her day started whatever that consisted of. She sat up and looked out the window. She couldn’t see anything so she drew back the curtains. She didn’t have the heart to tell Trey that the hotel had tempered slightly tinted windows. She looked over the city and the humans that were hustling from place to place, wishing she was one of them. If she was she could be happy and with the one whom a part of her wanted. Alex shook the thought of him from her mind and decided to head to the bathroom to take a shower.

When Alex got out of the shower she was dripping wet. Her hair was slicked back as she was wrapped up in nothing but a towel. She looked around the room. She didn’t want this. This isn’t how it was supposed to happen. Where was her happy ending? Why couldn’t she ever get what she wanted? All she wanted was love and no one was giving that to her.

“Why me? Huh? Why? What did I do to deserve this?” Alex shouted through tears as she looked up to the ceiling. She thought it’d make her feel better to blame some higher power. She thought it’d make her feel better to place a name and likeness to her plight. Overwhelmed with anger and pain Alex dropped to her knees and sobbed.

Trey knocked on the door and entered the room. He heard Alex shouting and rushed in. Alex looked up at him her eyes were filled with tears. She sniffled and was instantly in his arms. Trey tried his best to comfort her.

“It’s ok. I’m here. You’re going to be ok. I got you.” Trey whispered in her ear. Alex looked up at Trey. Their eyes locked on each other’s.

No. You can’t do this. I know you’re hurting, but imagine the aftermath.

Girl you better do it. He’s fine, and he’s right here offering himself to you. Take it.

Ignoring the back and forth going on in her head, Alex leaned in and kissed Trey. As she brought her arms up to wrap around his neck Trey pushed her off slightly. Their bodies were still close together.

“Alex. We can’t do—”

“Shhhh.” She told him as she placed a finger on his lips. “It’s ok. It’s what I want.”

“Alex-“

“Don’t fight it. Plus, you want it more than you’re putting on, so stop fighting and just give in. You’re losing this fight slowly anyway.” She said as she placed his lips on his gently. Trey pulled her closer to him and wrapped his arms around her waist. Alex felt him getting harder as the kiss got deeper.

Trey pulled the towel off Alex and threw let it drop to the floor. He took in Alex’s body inch by inch. He couldn’t take admiring the art without touching it any longer. He ran his hands gently down her soft smooth skin. He kissed her lips again and led her to the edge of the bed. Trey sat her down and placed his hand on her chest and gently pushed her down. He kissed her neck and bit down gently. Alex let out a small moan. Now she knew how it felt for someone else to be doing the biting. Trey made his way down to her breasts and took one of her nipples in his mouth. Alex sighed as he flicked his tongue against her nipple. She was feeling something before that she never felt before. Lust? Pure sexual energy? She was trying to figure out what she was feeling until Trey made it down between her thighs. Alex arched her back as she felt his tongue enter her. She instantly grabbed the sheets. Trey took his tongue out of her and flicked it against her soft spot. Alex moaned louder as she grinded her hips against his tongue.

Just as she was about to go over, Trey stopped suddenly. She let out a low growl of frustration. Trey went to take off his wife beater. Alex thought he was taking too long and slashed her fingernail against his shirt ripping it down the middle. Trey giggled as he picked her up and laid her in the bed. He slid his basketball shorts and Alex’s legs found their way around his waist. Alex let out a slight moan when she felt Trey enter her.

Trey started to move his hips slowly. Alex wrapped her arms around his shoulder as she took him in deeper. Trey sped up the pace of his movements as his hips went in circles. Alex’s body instantly responded as it shivered. Trey was hitting all the spots and taking her to a place she had never been before.

Now it’s your turn to take over. He made you feel good now return the favor.

Alex turned them both over so she was on top. She slowly rode Trey. She looked down at him and saw his eyes roll back into his head with every sway of her hips against him. Trey grunted and grabbed Alex’s waist as he went deeper into her. Alex sped up and Trey went crazy. They were both close to climaxing, she could feel it. Alex moaned loudly and was about to reach completion. She grabbed the headboard and brought herself closer to Trey. She sniffed his neck and went crazy. As she was on the climax she bit into Trey’s neck. As the blood entered her mouth and slid down her throat she climaxed. She sucked harder as she rode it out her orgasm and felt Trey climax as well.

Alex sat up and rolled over her chest heaving from all the hard work she had put in. She licked around her mouth and tasted the blood. She looked at Trey. He looked so peaceful. She looked at the sheets and saw blood. She quickly looked at Trey’s neck. She saw the bite marks.

“Where did those come from?” she said out loud. Trey didn’t look dead. She checked his pulse he was still alive…barely. She quickly got dressed and called 911.

“9-1-1 what is our emergency?” the dispatcher asked in a thivk New York accent.

“I need help. My friend, something’s happened to him. He’s bleeding pretty bad and his pulse is weak. Please send help!” Alex cried frantically.

“Ok ma’m we’ll send someone out right away. Where is your location?”

“He’s in the Hudson Hotel on the top floor. Suite 822. Please hurry.”

“Ok ma’m help is on the way.”

Alex immediately hug up the phone. She called from the hotel so it’d be easier for her to leave out without being seen. She put on her clothes and redressed Trey. She then decided that she had to make herself unseen. She kissed Trey and whispered in his ear.

“I’ll see you at the hospital. I’m so sorry.” She said as a tear fell on his cheek. She silently and invisibly exited the hospital. Alex found her bike right where she’d left it. She put on her helmet and rode off to the only place she could go…home.

Xander stood in the driveway as if he was waiting for her.

“I knew you’d come back eventually.” He snarled at her. “Of all the people in the world you had to sleep with the only one that gave a damn about you. Why are you here? What happened?”

“What are you going on about? Trey and I had sex, it was good, and then I bit him. Problem?” she said smartly.

“And you just left him there?”

“No! I called the ambulance and left as soon as possible. If I would’ve stayed they would’ve suspected me and I can’t have that!” she looked at Xander and he knew she wasn’t sorry. She didn’t regretted sleeping with Trey, but she did regret that she left him there. Xander looked in her eyes and saw it. Alex had checked out and Alexandria took her place.

“So the blood sucking was your idea huh?” he asked with his arms crossed.

“Yeah and it was good. There’s nothing better than the blood of your lover to send you into the best climax you’ve ever had.” She laughed.

Alexandria pushed past Xander and made her way to her room. She took a quick shower and looked in her closet. She picked out a black low cut v-neck t-shirt with a plaid Playboy bunny on the front. She grabbed her short pink and black plaid mini skirt and some black leggings. She put on her skirt and put on some thigh high black leather lace-up boots. As Alexandria was tying her boots up she heard Xander yelling. She raced downstairs and laughed.

“What’s all this screaming for?” she asked. Xander moved and she saw Damian standing in the doorway. Alexandria smiled and walked past Xander.

“Let’s go.” She said flatly.

“Go where?” Damian asked.

“I’m sick of being here with all the goody-two-shoes. I need to be somewhere where I can be me and not have to hide like a coward.” She hissed. As she made her way out the door Xander grabbed her arm.

“Lex, don’t do this. Stay here with us and I can help you.”Xander begged. Alexandria looked down at Xander’s hand with disgust. She snatched her arm away and marched out. She climbed into her car with Damian following close behind. As she pulled out the driveway and sped off, it hit him. Alex was gone and there was no telling when she’d come back. She was lost inside her own pain. He had to get himself ready for what was to come. He might have to fight his own sister. Xander looked up at the sky trying to gather himself together. He was ready now. Now the only question was, was the rest of the world?

"Broken Secrets"-Playlist

2010-01-07T05:43:00.002-05:00

This installment was inspired by the following songs:

"Broken Secrets"

2010-01-07T05:42:00.004-05:00

Alex stirred in her sleep. She was having the same nightmare. She was standing in the middle of the field. She knew what was going to happen next. She mentally braced herself for the attack, but it didn’t happen. She looked around the darkness and she saw him. She had waited for him as fear and anger consumed her being. He moved forward to her. Closer and closer he walked to her. His face was a blur, even when he stood in front of her, nothing. Alex took in a shaky breath as he began to speak.

“Hello Alexandria.” He greeted calmly.

“Hello.” She responded back in a small whisper. Who was he?

“Who I am is not important. It’s what I’m here to tell you that is.”

“And that would be what?”

“Things are not over. They’re just beginning. There’s more to this than just Damian. Those that you love may not be there, or alive to help you. Be careful Raindrop.” He brushed his hand across her cheek and walked away. Raindrop? Only one person called her Raindrop.

“Daddy! Wait! Daddy!” she screamed after him. She wanted to run to him. She willed herself so, but she stood there stuck, as if she was nailed to the ground. She felt a breath on the back of her neck. Alex quickly turned around to see Damian. She scowled at him.

“Now, now love. This is your dream. I’m not going to do anything you don’t want me to do.” He said calmly. Alex’s body loosened a bit and she stared at him. She had forgotten how handsome he was. He was dressed in a black suit with pinstripes with a white button down and fresh all black Air Force Ones. She forgot he dressed well too. She was remembering why she fell in love with him, before he turned into a blood sucking, murderous monster. Just as she was remembering their life together she heard the snow giving way to someone’s weight. She turned to look at who it was and almost fell to her knees. Her breath quickened as well as her heart as Jacques emerged from the darkness to the right of her. His tall and muscled physique was just as she remembered. His caramel skin almost shone in the moonlight. Now she knew she was dreaming.

Jacques made his way towards her. Damian stepped back and stood in a fighting stance. They always butted heads in reality, so acting this way in a dream wasn’t too far of a stretch. She turned to face him once she felt him close to her. Jacques took her into a hug and kissed her lips gently. She sighed as he pulled her body closer to him. She missed him so much. She inhaled his scent and then realized, this was all a dream. Alex snapped out of her moment and looked at Jacques.

“You’re dead. This can’t be real. This will never be real.” She cried. Jacques wiped the tears from her face.

“I may not be on this earth physically anymore, but I still come to you when your heart calls out to me. I’m always around you. I told you, I’d love you forever and beyond.” He whispered in her ear. His French accent wasn’t as thick and annoying as other French people. His was nice and pleasing and very seductive.

“Oh please. Let’s not forget she ripped your throat out and left you for dead in an alley. Plus she never loved you. She’s always loved me. We just had a small spat, didn’t we love?” Damian said slyly. He always thought he owned her, but Alex had to admit to that she had loved him and a part of her still did. Her thoughts of Jacques and what they shared were interrupted by the breaking of a twig. She released herself from Jacques’ embrace and looked to her left to see John. Her heart skipped a beat. She walked over to him and hugged him. John hugged her back and looked deep into her eyes.

“Alex, I love you.” He whispered to her.

“I love you too.”

“I need you to choose.” After he said that John, Jacques, and Damian stood in front of her. She fell to her knees and grabbed her head in frustration. When she opened her eyes Alexandria stood in front of Damian, while Lexa stood in front of Jacques and Alex stood in front of John. She stepped back as she saw herself times three looking at the three men she desired.

“Choose” they all said in unison. “You have to choose.”

Alex shot up out of her sleep. She was struggling to breathe. She looked over at her open window. Without even a thought she jumped out of it and landed softly on the ground. She looked around and took a deep breath. The cool crisp air filled her lungs. She exhaled and her mind went into a crazed frenzy.

“There’s nothing wrong with me.” She said to herself over and over again.

You dreamed of our dad and Jacques. I’m sorry sweetie but there is seriously something wrong with you. Bitch, suck it up and get it together.

Damn straight there’s nothing wrong with us. We all know whose fault this is. Damian has to die.

Her other personas argued with each other. She’s been having that dream for almost a week now, ever since she thought she saw Jacques. Her dad came to her in a dream for the first time, and came with a warning. The men she loved asked her to choose as her personas stood in front of the ones they admired. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t take this anymore.

“Something’s got to give! I can’t take it. All the arguing, violence, and death has to stop. I can’t take it anymore!” she screamed. She fell to her knees and started to breathe heavily.

“You know love; if you continue to scream at yourself people are going to assume you’re crazy.”

She knew this voice. Her stomach turned to ice at the sound of his voice. Alex gathered herself and stood up to face Damian as he stood in front of her.

“What are you doing here Damian?” she asked icily.

“Easy babe, I’m never too far away. I stay close unless you decide to change and give up this ridiculous charade of being humane.” He smiled slickly. Every word he spoke was drenched in evil, slick, sweet and seductive.

“Well you can forget it! I’m not ever going to go back to who I was. I hate who I was, and I hate you!”

No you don’t.

“No you don’t” he said slickly. He didn't know it, but it was in unison with the peanut gallery in her head. Alex hated this. She couldn’t love him. He was a monster! The devil incarnate even. She couldn’t love that. It was John she truly wanted, Damian just refused to make himself scarce.

You have to give it to him the nigga is persistent. Mmmm. Now I remember why I loved him. The sex was amazing as well.

Eww. Nobody wants to remember that but you, you trollop.

Alex shook off the thought as Alexandria tried to replay the memory. When Alex looked up, Damian was in front of her. He grabbed her by her waist and pulled her to him. Alex’s body went into a state of chaos. She was feeling things she hadn’t felt in a long time. Her body yearned for him as she made a mental note of every single inch of him. Alex snapped out of herself and realized what was happening. She pushed herself away from Damian and looked at him. She composed herself and glared at him.

“What do you want Damian? My life is screwed up enough without you feeling as if you need to drop in on me and drive me up a wall.” Damian smiled a devilish yet sexy smile.

“Up a wall you say? You still want me. A part of your mind does and your body; well we both know what it wants.” Damian said smoothly. He could talk a nun out of her panties and have her swinging from a chandelier in a church if he wanted to. Actually he had, once. Xander walked out of the house to see what was wrong with Alex. He glared at Damian and growled a low growl. Alex looked quickly at Xander and continued to speak.

“Damian, it’s cute that you still think I want you at all.” Alex lied. She tried to cover it up with a laugh.

“Whatever. I’m not here for that. I’m here for something else. I’m looking for something…someone.” He sounded concerned.

“Well I haven’t seen anyone, so goodbye and go die.” Alex said. Her words dripped with hate and disgust. Then the wind blew. The cool breeze brushed against her hair, causing it to sway slightly. Alex sniffed the air. She smelled it again. That same smell she smelled a week ago. The smell she smelled when she thought she saw Jacques on the beach. It was back. Alex looked around first at Xander, then Damian, and finally focused on a male shaped figure that was walking toward her. Alex looked at Damian.

“I think who you’ve been looking for has been following me.”

“I’m sure he has. He’s very interested in your whereabouts, Alex.” He said with a slight smile.

“And what does he want with me? I don’t do stalkers. They’re not my type.” She said looking over her shoulder as the figure stopped in the darkness. Proud of telling Damian and his “friend” off she turned to walk into the house.

“It’s not stalking if the person is someone who has something of yours.” Alex stopped dead in her tracks. That voice. It wasn’t Damian’s voice. It was the voice of another.

“And what is it that I have that happens to belong to you?” She asked carefully with her back to him. She felt him staring at her, hell she felt him on her. He stood directly behind her.

“My heart.” He said into her ear. Alex pinched her thigh to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. This had to be a dream. This wasn’t real. It couldn’t be. Her heartbeat quickened and her breathing did as well. Alex looked at Xander. The expression on his face indicated that this wasn’t a dream.

“And how long have I had your heart?” she asked as her voice quivered. Her throat went dry as she felt him take her hand and pull her closer to him.

“123 years.” His words spun inside Alex’s head, making her dizzy. It couldn’t be. She had to be sure. She slowly turned to face him. As soon as she smelled him she knew it was all true. Alex looked him in the eyes and her knees weakened.

“Jacques?” she asked as she placed her hand on his cheek. He nodded as he held her hand. They were both making sure that this whole thing was real.

“How is this possible? I killed you. You were dead.” She said as she immediately hung her head in shame. Jacques placed his finger under her chin and lifted her head to look at him. Her eyes were wide as they were filled with tears. One tear escaped and rolled down her cheek as it glistened in the moonlight. Jacques pulled her to him and embraced her. She took in his smell and it felt just like before. Before Damian lied, before she “caught” him, before that day. Something was off. Jacques wasn’t warm anymore, he was cold. He felt as if he was a statue. She pushed herself away from him. There was fear and shock in her eyes.

“You’re a vampire aren’t you?” she asked fearfully. Jacques nodded. “Who turned you?”

“That would be me.” Damian said evilly as he stepped forward as if he was presenting a project. That’s exactly what Jacques was…a project. “I did pretty well huh, Alex?”

“No! You turned a sweet, kind, loving man into a monster just like the rest of us! Why would you do this Damian? WHY?!” she cried. Her perfect Jacques wasn’t that anymore. He’s killed people, she was sure of it. No way he rolls with Damian and doesn’t feed on humans. She thought.

“Revenge.”

“What? On who? Me?” Damian laughed.

“Not everything is about you my dear. It was revenge on him. He was supposed to suffer and live for all eternity without you. If I couldn’t have you no one could. He wasn’t supposed to find you, but I couldn’t stay away and he followed me to you one day.” Damian explained.

“When?” Xander asked as he stepped forward to comfort his sister.

“When she left him to die, I found him in that alley way dying and let him feed from me. I was secretly teaching him how to be a vampire right behind your back. While you grieved and blamed yourself for his death he was no more than two towns over at all times.” Damian laughed devilishly. Anger built up inside of her. He kept him from her for 120 years! He needed to suffer now. Her anger boiled over as she lunged at him. Jacques grabbed her by the waist and pulled her to him again.

“Alex my love, I guarantee you I am no monster. I do not feed on humans. I never have. I swear to you. Damian told me how angry you were with yourself when you thought I was dead. I never wanted to put anyone else through that pain.” His words soothed her, like they had always done. She gently pushed herself away from him.

“Jacques, as excited I am to see you, I can’t be with you.” She said.

“Why not?” he asked with hurt in his eyes. The same hurt was heard in his voice.

“Because of the human guy, John, that’s why. She loves him.” Damian said spitefully. Jacques looked down at her, the hurt growing in his eyes as she nodded slowly.

“I do.” She said softly. Jacques placed a fake smile on his face.

“Very well then. You will always have my heart, Alex. I will wait for you, no matter how long that takes.” He kissed her hand and disappeared into the night.

“Yeah right! I’ll get you first.” Damian laughed and followed after Jacques.

Alex turned to face Xander. She didn’t even have to say anything. He already knew. Now she was conflicted, angry, betrayed, confused. She was all over the place and it was exhausting. She raced up to her room, she needed to be alone. Her mind raced at a mile a minute as she sat in the dark. This wasn’t happening to her. It couldn’t be. Everything was happening to her all at once. She couldn’t take it and started to cry. She laid her head on her pillow and cried herself to sleep.

The next morning she awoke to Xander knocking on her door. She slipped on her Jack Skellington slippers and opened the door.

“Lex, we need to talk.” He said as Alex made her way back to her bed. He closed the door behind him. They both sat and looked at each other.

“Speak.” She said flatly.

“So Jacques is really back huh?” Alex nodded without looking at him. How could she forget? His scent was still on her skin. “So what are you going to do?”

“Nothing. He’s rolling with Damian now. There’s no telling how he is now.”

“He sounds the same to me, but then again he’s been with Damian this whole time. Do you still love him?”

“Yes. No. I don’t know. It hasn’t even been twenty-four hours since he popped back up into my life. I haven’t even processed that he’s still alive.”

“What about John? Do you love him?”

“Of course I do. I think. Ugh! Why me? Why does my life have to be so hard?” she asked angrily. “I need to eat. I’m going downstairs.” She said as she got up. She went to the door and opened it. John stood there with an angry look on his face, his eyes looking as if they were filling with tears.

“So Jacques is alive huh?” he asked angrily. Alex nodded slowly. “Do you still love him?” Alex shrugged. “Do you love me?” Alex hung her head and sighed. “That’s all I needed to hear.”

“John wait! I do!” she yelled after him as he ran off. She ran after him and cut him off at the stairs.

“Move.” He said coldly. Alex looked down to see his duffle bag next to him on the floor.

“You’re leaving?” her voice quivered more than she intended for him to hear.

“Well you don’t know if you love me or him. Your first vampire ex boyfriend wants me dead. He kidnaps me and almost kills me and not once have I doubted how I feel about you!” he yelled.

“How do you feel? Tell me!” she didn’t mean to yell but he was cutting deep.

“I LOVE YOU! I always have! Why else would I stay around through all this shit?! But since you don’t know how you feel, I’m out!” He pushed past her angrily. She had no choice but to let him go.

“John, don’t go!” she cried. John stopped right in front of the front door. He turned to face her.

“Do you love me?”

“Yes!” Alex yelled.

“Like you love Jacques?” Silence fell upon the room. “Answer me!” he yelled.

“That’s not fair.” She whispered.

“What’s not fair? You either love me like you do him or not. So, do you love me like you love Jacques?” Alex hung her head. “That’s all I needed to hear. Goodbye Alex. Have a nice life!” he said as he headed out to his car. Now Alex regretted driving him from the hospital in his own car. She tried to run after his car until Xander stopped her. What was she going to do if she caught him? She saw the anger and pain in his eyes. She still didn’t know what she wanted, she just knew she wanted John there to help her figure it out. She ran back in the house tears streaming down her face.

“Lex?” Xander asked concerned. He worried for his sister. He could feel what she was feeling and a tear fell from his eye. He looked down at Alaska. His ears perked up and he whimpered.

“No one should ever feel that way. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy,” he told him as he heard the door slam.

A few hours passed and Alex sat on the roof with John’s jacket. It was all she had left of him. She held it as she cried and looked onto the horizon.

You should’ve just told him you loved him.

Girl bye! Fuck all that! You need to suck that shit up and move on! He was human! He was going to die eventually! I say we go eat him, but that’s me.

Alex swung into the room that only hours ago belonged to John. She curled up in his bed and just laid there crying. He was gone and not coming back.

***

It’d been a whole week since John left. Alex still hadn’t moved from that same spot. She wouldn’t let Xander in the room saying he’d taint the smell of the room. Everything from the air to his sheets still smelled of him. It was all she had left of him. She couldn’t take being here, but she didn’t want to leave. She reached into her pocket and grabbed her cell phone. She pressed ‘3’ on her speed dial. The phone rang and went straight to voicemail.

Hey, you’ve reached John. I’m not able to come to the phone right now so please leave your name, a message, and you number and I’ll get back to you.

He sounds happy. I remember when he made that message. She thought to herself. She grabbed her phone and pressed ‘4’ on her speed dial. The other line began to ring. Someone picked up.

“Hey baby girl. What’s up?”

“Hey Trey.” She sniffled.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“John and I broke up. It was really bad.” She began to cry.

“Aww baby girl. It’s going to be ok. You need anything? I know how you felt about him..”

“Are you in town?” she asked.

“Yeah. I’m gonna be here for about a week. I have a video to shoot and then a show. You wanna stay with me while I’m here?” He always had a way of knowing exactly what she wanted.

“Yeah, if you don’t mind, I need a change of scenery.” She sniffled again.

“Well I’ll be where I usually am in about an hour. So get dressed and shower ‘cause you’re not stinkin’ up my room, pack some clothes and drive on over. Ok?”

“Ok.” Alex sniffled. “Thanks Trey. You’re a good friend.”

“No problem baby girl. I’d do anything for you, you know that. See you soon.” Alex hung up the phone with Trey. He always knew how to make her feel a little better. She was still broken inside but Trey made it hurt just a little less. That’s what she loved about him. She got up and looked at herself in the mirror. Her eyes were puffy, her hair was all over the place, and her nose was swollen from crying so much. She looked like hell. Alex walked into what was John’s bathroom and took a shower. She wrapped herself up in his towel and walked over to her room and got dressed. She packed her bag and put on John’s jacket. She had to have something of his close to her at all times, and his jacket was the only thing she had left. Alex walked out her room and headed for the door. Xander stood in front of it, blocking her way outside.

“Lex, you’re not going anywhere.” He said commandingly. Alex sighed,

“Move out the way Xander, I’m leaving. Now move voluntarily or I will be forced to do it myself. I’m stronger than you are.” She said in a low voice.

“I’m not letting you leave like this. You just can’t leave.”

“I need to get my head together and I can’t do it here. Not when his room is next to mine.” She began to cry again. Alaska brushed against her leg; she bent down to pet him.

“I’ll be back in a bit boy. Ok? I love you.” She looked up at Xander. “Love you too.” With those being her last words she headed towards the garage. She put on her helmet and mounted her motorcycle. Keeping her destination mentally hidden from Xander she rode off towards the city. As the scenery sped past her, she thought about everything. Xander. Damian. Jacques. She thought of her family, her life up until now and of course John. Her life was falling apart around her. She couldn’t handle it anymore, her only piece of sanity and consistency was still thirty minutes and counting away. One tear escaped her eye as she rode towards the city. When would the pain stop? When could she be happy again? She didn’t know. Hell, she didn’t know anything. One thing she did know for sure was; she’s never felt deader inside than she did the day he walked out her life with her heart in his hand.

"Hidden"-Playlist

2009-12-27T19:23:00.003-05:00

This installment was inspired by the following songs:

"Hidden"

2009-12-27T18:41:00.001-05:00

A week had passed and John was released from the hospital. He was still a little beat up and Alex thought this was the perfect time to play doctor. She decided that John would be safer at her house where she could watch him closely, and keep him safe. She never showed anyone where she lived before, especially anyone that wasn’t already dead (vampire wise that is).

It was a clear cool night outside so Alex went out to clear her mind. She had a lot going on right now and she didn’t know how to handle it. She swooped from the roof over to John’s window. He was sleeping peacefully. He always looked that way when he slept, until he’d mumble something about Damian. He probably was going to need therapy after dealing with her. But how is someone going to help him when he tells the he was attacked by a vampire because he was with his ex-girlfriend, who was also a vampire, along with her twin brother? Alex smiled at the thought of John being hauled away to a loony bin for telling the truth. Mental institutions usually scared her, but this time it was kind of funny. She imagined John looking like the Riddler at the end of Batman Forever, rocking back and forth saying “Vampires do exist! My girlfriend and her brother are vampires. They have fangs and drink blood through crazy straws!”She laughed again. John stirred in his sleep. Alex listened closely. He was quiet. She breathed a sigh of relief and continued to watch him. Her heart belonged to him now, whether she liked it or not. Realizing this, questions swam through her mind. Is this the right thing to do? No. ? Yes Can she love him without hurting him? No, I wanna eat him. Yes. ?. Did she really love him? Yes. No. ? Her inner debate with herself was interrupted when John rolled over in his sleep.

“I can feel you staring at me you know.” He said eyes still closed. Alex smiled and climbed quickly to the roof. John opened his eyes and looked to where Alex and crouched. Nothing was there. He smiled as Xander walked into the room. He looked serious and concerned. He grabbed a chair from the desk and sat down. For what seemed like the longest minute on record, they just stared at each other. Xander broke the silence first.

“You know there’s more to all of this than what she’s telling you, right?” John looked at the floor.

“Yeah, I kind of figured that. She seemed like she was hiding something from me, but who am I to ask?” he questioned in a low voice. He almost sounded hurt.

“I think its best that she didn’t. She’s not stable enough to tell you something like that.”

“Something like what?” John asked concerned. Alex was hiding something from him and he didn’t know if he really wanted to hear it.

“Something like she has three different personalities.” Xander said calmly. John’s eyes widened.

“What? What do you mean?”

“I mean that she can be one of three people. Alex-the nice/good girl you know. Alexandria-the bad and evil girl she used to be, and possibly wants to kill you, and Lexa-the girl that’s a little bit of both.”

“Why are you telling me this?” he asked.

“I want you to know who she is. You claim you care for her, you’re going to have to accept her for everything.”

“I’ve accepted that she was a vampire. Is that enough?” Xander shook his head.

“You just accepted that she’s a vampire with a troubled past, and just discovered she could change into a whole different person fairly quickly. Are you able to handle all of that?” Xander asked. John didn’t answer. He actually had to think about this. He cared for Alex, but was this too much?

Alex stood on a branch high on a pine tree in her yard. It overlooked the lake. She liked to think there when the roof just didn’t feel right. The debate within her from before continued.

You can’t have him and be who you are. You’re a vampire and he’s a human. Look at what happened already. It’s bound to happen again Alex. Thin k about it. Remember Jacques. Soon you won’t be able to control yourself and end up killing him anyway. You can only survive so long as his blood tortures you with each passing day.

You can be with him. You did it before with Jacques. Yes, you killed him, but not because of your hunger, but because of your temper. Plus Damian manipulated you.

As her different personas battled, a cool breeze brushed past her and Alex shivered. Alex sniffed the air around her. Something’s not right. She thought to herself. She sniffed the air again. It smelled different. It didn’t smell crisp and of damp soil and leaves. Something smelled wrong. It felt wrong. It was just wrong. Just all out wrong. Alex gathered herself and headed back to the house. She could hear that John was talking to Xander. She scaled the house and swung into John’s open window. She landed in the middle of the room and slowly stood up as she felt the room out. Xander and John looked at each other, and then at Alex.

“What’s wrong Lex?” Xander asked first.

“Yeah, what’s wrong? You look guarded.” John asked. Alex looked down at the floor and closed her eyes. Her breathing got heavier and sped up. She raised her head; eyes still closed and sniffed the air. Alex brought her head back down and opened her eyes. One of her eyes was crimson red, the other deep honey brown. Alex had left the building and left Lexa in her place.

“Something’s not right.” Lexa said coldly. She turned to look at John. He stared at her. Lexa was something new to him since he really didn’t get to experience her presence at the warehouse. He wanted to say something, but decided against it. Instead he looked at her as if he could read her thoughts. He looked deep into her eyes and saw Alex, his Alex. He didn’t know if he could handle this, but he knew he had to try, if not for him, than at least for the woman who carried his heart.

Lexa looked at John again and nodded her head. She shot a look at the window, and was gone with a flash. John and Xander raced to the window to see if they could see her. They searched for something in the dark and a saw a shadow bouncing from tree to tree. It was Lexa; she was heading down towards the beach on the other side of the road in front of the house. They watched her until she was completely out of sight. Xander turned around and headed for the door. He stopped before he hit the hallway and looked at John.

“Are you sure you can handle this?” he asked again. John said nothing. He just shrugged his shoulders and sat on the bed staring out the window. Xander turned to walk into the hallway.

“I’ll just have to try.” he said before Xander left. Was he really able to handle this or was he just lying to himself to keep Alex. He accepted she was a vampire, she was a good guy. Alexandria? Not so much. And Lexa was an enigma wrapped in a puzzle and candy coated with a question. He had a lot to think about as he looked into the darkness.

Lexa jumped from the tree and land gently on the cool soft sand on the beach. She looked around…nothing. Why was she pulled here? She took off her shoes and walked along the shoreline, water crashing over her feet as she walked, her eyes constantly scanning the beach. She got the sudden feeling that she was being watched. Lexa quickly turned around and saw a shadowy figure of a man. She couldn’t make out who it was in the pitch black of night. She stared some more. Damian. She thought. She crouched low to the sand, ready to attack if need be. The figure walked toward her, and she let out a low growl. This figure moved closer. Fangs bared, fists balled, she growled again as he moved closer into the moonlight. She was ready to attack as everything that Damian put her through in the past few weeks replayed in her head. He stepped into the moonlight and Lexa gasped. She had seen this face before. She knew this face once upon a time. The face that looked back at her wasn’t Damien’s, it was another.

“Jacques?” she asked with a quiver in her voice. Lexa closed her eyes, and when she opened them again he was gone. Had Jacques really been standing there? She shook her head. It couldn’t have been. Alexandria killed him over a century ago. This was impossible. An eerie feeling overcame her and she shivered. There was only one way to prove to herself that she was imagining things. Lexa walked over to the spot where he stood and saw not one single footprint. She sniffed the air around her; it smelled the same as before. Was she losing what was left of her mind? She must have been if she thought she saw Jacques standing in front of her not too long ago. Lexa ran her fingers through her long jet black hair.

There’s no way that you saw him. There’s just no possible way.

Of course there’s no way! I killed him a long time ago. Trust me; he was dead when I left him.

Lexa ran back towards the house. She had to get down to the bottom of this. Maybe she was sleep deprived. She had been looking after John for a while, surviving off small cat naps. She hadn’t been eating too well either. She had a blood pouch every now and then, but that wasn’t nearly enough. As she ran back to the house she ran every possible reason of why she didn’t see what, or who she thinks she saw.

When she reached her house she jumped into her open bedroom window. A loud thud echoed throughout the house. Xander rushed into her room to see what was going on.

“What wrong Lex?”

“Something’s not right.” She said calmly.

“I know, you said that earlier. Something else is wrong, I feel it. Spill.” Lexa closed her eyes. She’s never been this rattled before in her life. Had she seen a ghost, or had it been her imagination playing tricks with her mind?

“I think I saw Jacques. Or I didn’t see him. I don’t know what I saw, but I saw him.” She whispered frantically. Xander looked at her as if she was crazy.

“Jacques? I hate to tell you, but he’s dead. He’s been dead. You just imagined it. There’s no way you saw him. You need some rest. Lay down.” Xander directed her. He left the room and the internal debate between personas began.

There he goes being the big brother again.

Oh please! He’s always been that way. We’re only apart by five minutes. Plus rest is for the weak. We have things to figure out.

Maybe he’s right. We have stretched ourselves fairly thin these past few weeks. Between school and Damien we haven’t rested well. Let’s eat and then rest up. We can figure out the rest later.

Eat? You mean those latex abominations you call blood? Please! Don’t be pathetic. We need REAL blood. Fresh blood and we have some right next door.

Shut up Alexandria! No one is going to hurt John. You may not care for him but we do.

The both of you shut up! This is exhausting. We’re not going to hurt John. It’s my turn to bat and I’m getting some blood from the fridge and I’m going to bed. WE need the rest.

No need to go downstairs. There’s a mini fridge over there in the corner.

Lexa looked and saw it. She nodded as her mouth began to water. She walked over to the fridge and picked a pouch of B-. She smiled at the irony of her choice. She placed the pouch into the microwave and watched it as it rotated slowly on the carousel. She grabbed her favorite blue crazy straw and removed the pouch from the microwave. Lexa slowly made her way to the bed. She stabbed the straw into the pouch and began to drink. As soon as she swallowed her first sip she could feel the blood’s energy spread throughout her body, warming and relaxing it. By the time the pouch was a quarter full she started to drift. Finish it! They told her. Instead of using her energy o drink through the straw, she ripped the pouch open with her teeth and gulped down the last of it. As that last drop hit her tongue, she lay down and closed her eyes. As she was about to drift away, there was a knock at the door.

“Come in.” she said sleepily. John walked into the room. Lexa looked up at him and laid her head back onto her pillow.

“Xander told me about you needing some rest. Thought you could use some company.” He said as he walked onto the other side of her bed. John climbed into bed with her. He laid next to her and wrapped his arm around her. She looked like Alex. She smelled like Alex, but she wasn’t. She was like this Alex hybrid. Could he trust her? Could he love her? John’s heartbeat quickened, and his body stiffened. Lexa took notice.

“John, I’m not going to bite you. Obviously, you knew that because you’re all cuddled up with me. You know who I am. It’s ok, relax. Your heartbeat is keeping me awake. Lexa buried herself into John as she tried to go back to sleep.

“Maybe this won’t be so hard.” He whispered.

“It’s not as complicated as you’re trying to make it. Now let me sleep.” Those were the last words Lexa spoke before she drifted off to sleep. John turned on the T.V. while Lexa slept in his arms.

***

Damian looked angrily at Alex’s window. He’d been there the entire time, hiding, spying.

“You think you may have won this time mortal, but she will be mine again, even if I have to kill you to do it.” He snarled at the window. He looked to the left of him. We will have out revenge, that’s what I turned you for in the first place. I need you, and you’re going to help me. We were enemies and now we are partners.” He spoke to the person next to him.

“When do we strike Damian?” he asked.

“Soon.” Damian said. “Soon my friend. Now let us leave, we have things to plan and havoc to wreak.” He smiled sinisterly as he and the other sped off into the shadows of the night with the moonlight guiding their way.

Blood Memories

2009-12-20T01:10:00.003-05:00

John looked over at Alex. She was standing at the window fully alert. She scanned over the parking lot repeatedly. She was almost guardian like. This was obviously an attempt for her to stall having to tell John everything about her. John looked at her again. He studied her. She hadn’t moved for an hour. She just got up and went to the window and stood perfectly still. The dim, pale fluorescent lights created a shadow of her body that was just as dark as the times that she was going to eventually recollect. I have to know everything else she’s kept from me. I just have to! John thought to himself. As he thought again about how she lied to him his heart ached. He felt a chill roll up his spin at the thought of what type of things her past held. He shook. Alex turned to check on him.

“Are you ok?” she asked concerned.

“I’m fine. Alex, you’re going to have to tell me eventually. You promised.”

Alex shivered at the thought. She had promised, but she didn’t think she had to deliver on it. She just figured she’d say yes and he’d go to sleep, wake up and forgot about it. You can always work some of your vamp mojo and he can “forget” that he asked. She thought. She shook off the thought. She couldn’t do that. She was going to have to tell him eventually, so she might as well get it over with.

“Alex?” John asked.

“Huh?” she responded. She slowly turned to face him and sighed. Suck it up and do it. If he leaves after this you can always kill him or make him forget. Either one is ok with us. Great, now they were giving input. Alex rolled her eyes and sat in the chair in the corner.

“What exactly do you want to know?” she asked reluctantly. John tried to sit up and groaned in pain. Alex looked at him, seeing how fragile he was made her think that this whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing was a mistake. John looked at her and smiled. Alex loved when he smiled. It made her feel, well…good.

“So are you Team Edward or Team Jacob? I assume since you’re a vampire you’re all about Team Edward.” he laughed. Alex shook her head and rolled her eyes. She never saw that coming.

“Well actually, I’m Team Jacob. Edward is too sissy for me. He sparkles! I don’t know about you but that doesn’t sit right with me. All infatuated with some girl. Ugh! Don’t get me started on Edward and the Cullens, except Alice and Emmett. I like them. Plus have you seen Jacob?!WHOA!” She ranted while she smiled. John smiled and laughed a small laugh.

“What are you over there smiling about?” she asked. John looked at her and smiled a slick, flirty smile.

“I made you smile. It’s the first time you’ve smiled since you’ve been here. It’s kind of nice.” Alex looked at him and hung her head as she felt her cheeks warm. She pulled her knees to her chest and started messing with her nails.

“What do you want to know?” she mumbled. John’s face turned serious. Now it was time to get down to business.

“How old are you?”

“I told you that before. I’ve been 21 for about 333 years.” she said as she still fiddled with her nails. John thought for a moment and then his face changed from serious to concern.

“Do you know who bit you?” he asked. Alex shook head still looking at the floor.”Was it your choice?” Alex shook her head again. John’s heart broke as he saw the slight change in her face. It pained her to think about that, and he saw it.

“How was your life before it happened?”

“It was pretty good. I was from a wealthy family. I had my brother Xander, my little brother Christian,my little sister Anastasia, and my parents. I had friends, and I even had a boyfriend. My life was together and then it was snatched from me.” Alex sighed to keep her from feeling too much about her past.

“How did it happen?”Alex‘s body stiffened. John noticed this and realized the question made her uncomfortable. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Alex looked up at him and saw that he was sincere. She looked back down at the floor and shook her head.

“No, it’s ok.” Alex said. She crossed her legs and looked up at him. “It was December 23^rd, 1632. I was helping my mom decorate the house for Christmas and we got into a fight.” Alex’s eyes started to fill with tears. She sniffled and continued. “I got angry, yelled at my mother, and stormed out into the night. It was freezing and very snowy outside. I just kept walking, and walking. I didn’t know I was in the woods until I smelled pine trees. I realized how far I was, and turned around to head back. I heard a twig snap on the side of me and looked around and saw nothing, so I kept walking. Then I heard another one and looked around and when I looked in front of me I saw crimson red eyes staring back at me deep in the darkness. I got scared, turned around and ran. I didn’t car where I went I just didn’t want it to get me. Then when I ended up in this clearing, I stopped running and thought he stopped chasing me.” Alex took a deep breath to gather herself and looked at the floor. She gulped and continued.

“I looked around and didn’t see anything. I heard another twig break and saw the eyes again. I saw a shadowy male figure step out from the woods and smile as he walked towards me. I froze and then screamed and he lunged at me and sank his teeth into my throat. I could feel him sucking on my neck as I slipped into unconsciousness.” Alex sniffled and John saw a single tear run down her cheek. There was nothing more he wanted that to leap out of the bed and console his hurting girlfriend.

“You ok Alex?” he asked sincerely. Alex looked at him and nodded. He didn’t know what to do, this was obviously upsetting her. “What happened afterwards?”

Once I regained consciousness later that night, I was dizzy and disoriented and freezing. He left me in the snow. I looked down and the pure white snow was sticky, red and tainted. There was blood everywhere, my blood.” She stressed the word ‘my’ while she choked back a sob. “I weakly made my way back home in the cold, using trees to prop me up whenever I got too weak.” She took another deep breath and paused. “When I made it home to my town I saw blood everywhere, bodies of people I knew were strewn across the ground, some in the snow, some on the roads, and some more in their houses. I rushed to my house and opened the front door. I looked down to see my entire family dead on the floor, slaughtered like livestock.”Alex shook at the thought and the image of that night crossed her mental vision.”I saw my sister, mother, and both my brothers with their throats ripped open. I turned to go back into the night for help when I heard a groan. I turned around and it was Xander. He was reaching trying to grab me from far away. I walked over to and lay next to him. I took his hand, knowing that now he was the only family had left and we both passed out. When we came to we were vampires. We cleaned the house, buried our family, and walked into the early morning with England, and our family behind us.”

“Wow, Alex. I didn’t know that that happened to you. I’d thought you were just bitten and moved on with your life.”

“Nope, I just pretended I was ok with it for Xander’s sake. He worries too much you know.” John looked out the window. He knew Xander was there in the parking lot, waiting, watching carefully to make sure nothing or no one interrupted them. John could only imagine what Xander was feeling right now.

“So when did Damien come in?” he asked. Alex looked up when she heard a small ting of hatred in his voice. Who could blame him? It was because of Damian (and herself for bringing him into this because she listened to her stupid emotions.) that he was here in the hospital. Alex sighed and continued on.

“Damian came in around June 1740, we met in Italy. Damian was cute and he seemed more comfortable with being a vampire, while Xander and I still resented who we had become. Damian was tempting and had his ways. He showed me it was ok to be who I was now, and humans, needed to fear and respect us because they were below us. Vampires were higher, better beings because we are immortal. I didn’t want to believe him; I still had faith in the human race, until that day came along.”

“What day?” John asked. He thought he sounded a little more interested than he should be.

“The day the humans betrayed me. The day I lost my faith in humanity and became a monster and just didn’t give a damn.” Alex started.

“What happened, Alex?”

“They locked me up.” She said flatly as she stared blankly at a spot on the wall.

“Who?”

“The vampire hunters.” She said still not moving her eyes from the spot on the wall. “They stormed our house one night because they followed Damian home after he killed some girl. Damian and Xander weren’t home so when they stormed the house they shot me with a silver bullet that knocked me out, and dragged me somewhere. When I finally came to I was hanging by my writs in a dark room, dark even for me, and I could hear screaming and rapid mumblings of spirits and the devil coming to murder people. I knew then where I was, I was in the insane asylum in town.” She shook at the memory. She heard a sound at the window and saw Xander in the tree by the window. He looked her in the eyes and Alex shook her head, and with that Xander was gone.

“What happened to you there? I mean, it had to be pretty bad for Xander to react like that after just a thought.” John said as he looked out the window.

“Yeah it was. They beat me, shot me, electrocuted me, and tortured me beyond all means of even a vampire’s tolerance of torture.” John raised an eyebrow and Alex knew exactly what he was thinking. “Yes vampires can feel pain. Especially after being staked numerous times and shot with silver bullets, after something like that we’re almost human. Anyway, they hated me for what I am, so they tortured me for it. They wanted to prove their “dominance” over me. One day three men came in laughing and carrying on. It was as if they were at a party. They smelled cigar smoke and wine. I will never forget that smell. One of them walked over to me and slapped me. He kissed me on the cheek and then my neck. His hot breath was on my shoulder.” Alex cringed, shook it off and continued. “My breathing started to become rapid, and then he put his hand on the waistband of my pants. I snapped. I kicked him in the balls and then snapped his neck with my legs when he was kneeling on the floor. I pulled whatever strength I had and released myself from the ropes. The other two men ran and I took that as a challenge. I ripped both of their throats open and drank ‘em both dry. When I opened the door Xander and Damian were in front of it. We walked out of the hospital into the night leaving nothing but a trail of bloodied and mangled dead bodies behind us. From that day forward I swore that humans had to pay for what they did to me, I didn’t care who they were, they were going to pay.” Alex looked at John and saw that he had a worried look on his face.

“So you were responsible for the Pacifica Mente Asylum massacre?” Alex nodded slowly.

“You must think I’m a monster huh?” she asked him shamefully.

“No, of course not Alex that was who you were, not who you are now. You were scarred, tortured, and violated. I would have done the same.” He gave her a reassuring nod and she felt as if she could continue. “What happened after that?”

“We wrecked havoc everywhere we went. We were the demonized harbingers of death, destruction, and chaos and we loved it. Eventually, Damian and I fell in love. We had a relationship full of passion, rage, and lust. It was something for the vampire ages, until I met Jacques.”

“Who was Jacques?”

“He was my first human boyfriend. We met in Paris. He really loved me. He accepted me for who I was.” Her voice started to quiver and she gulped down a large breathe of air to loosen the lump in her throat.”Damian hated that I moved on from him. We were together for 113 years, and he didn’t want that to end, especially not to a human. Damian went on a jealous rampage and killed anyone in his way, and he even convinced Xander to go along with it. Damian came to me and told me that Jacques never loved me, and that he was using me and was unfaithful. He took me to see him and I saw him hugging another woman. I couldn’t control my emotions and out of anger, took part in the blood filled rampage. When I cornered Jacques in an alley, I killed him.” Tears ran quickly down Alex’s cheek. She sniffled. “The last thing he said to me was ‘I love you’.”

“Wow , Alex.” was all John could say about what he heard. He was speechless to the fact that his girlfriend killed the one human man she loved, the same spot that he now filled in her heart. Alex looked up at John, her eyes pleading for something more to be said.

“After that I couldn’t live with what I did, so I left Xander and Damian. I traveled the world and every year visit the graves of my family, which were preserved because the massacre was famous, and my family was kind of a big deal. Xander and I marked our own graves, so people wouldn’t get suspicious. I visit my family, and then I go to Paris to visit Jacques grave. I feel like it helps me remember why I want to be good. I’ve gone to school and done the best that I could to shorten the time I spend around humans so I wouldn’t lose control. I was doing pretty well until Damian found me at school. That’s why I wasn’t there that day. I wasn’t sick, I had things to do to prepare. I don’t know what happened after that but all I know is that I have three personalities, Alex, Lexa, and Alexandria. Alexandria is the one you met and did all those horrible things back then. I tried to leave her behind, but she caught up with me. Now I’m scared that I can’t control anything and you might get hurt. I can’t take it if I lost control around you and something happened.” She looked up at John with her eyes full of tears. He motioned for her to come to him. Alex slowly walked over to him and sat next to him on the bed. She snuggled next to him and lay down. John stroked her hair and kissed her head. She felt safe, cared about, and human. What she was feeling scared her but she mentally shook it off.

“You know I’ve waited for you for over a year, you’re not going to get rid of me that easily. I don’t care about who you were in the past. I care about who you are now, that’s all that matters.” He whispered in her ear. She buried herself deeper into his embrace and decided to let the feelings of love and safety take over her as she fell asleep in John’s arms.

"Revealed"-Playlist

2009-12-07T20:24:00.000-05:00

Create a playlist at MixPod.com

"Revealed"

2009-12-07T00:37:00.001-05:00

Alex stared at her phone for what seemed to be forever. In all reality it had only been an hour. Xander stared at his twin sister. He knew she was thinking about something, but what exactly? Before he could even come up with a plan in his head the phone rang. Alex picked it up on the first ring.

“Damian.” She said coldly.

“Aww my love, now that sounded like you weren’t happy to hear back from me.” He teased.

“Considering the circumstances of the situation, no I don’t want to hear from you, but since you have John I had to change the game plan.”

“Aww, how sweet. I just might vomit. The time is ticking for your little boy toy and you want to make snarky remarks. Bad move on your part, love.” Damian laughed. Alex balled her hands into a tight fist. Her knuckles were turning almost stone white. She was holding herself back from destroying everything Damian stood for.

“Let me talk to John.” Alex demanded.

“I’m the one calling the shots here darling. You’ll talk to him in due time.”

“NOW DAMIAN!” Alex yelled. Damian always knew how to push her buttons and telling her no was one of them.

“Alex?” a shaky voice asked. She shivered at the sound of his voice.

“John are you ok?”She asked frantically.

“I’m fine. I just don’t know where I am. Who is Damian?”

“He’s nobody. Don’t worry; I’m coming to get you. I-“ She was cut off when she heard John grunt and a punch land.

“John!” she heard herself scream.

“Now if you want to see him alive, you’ll do as I say, understand?”

“Yes.” Alex replied weakly. She hated Damian having the upper hand in any situation. The worst part was that it involved John’s life, so she had no choice but to sit back and cooperate.

“That’s a good girl. Now my sweet, if you wish to “save” your little human boy toy, come to the old abandoned Calvin Klein warehouse in the Garment District in an hour.” Damian commanded. He hung up the phone and Alex stood up. She looked at Xander and then her cell phone. She stood up with her head hung low. Her hair covered her face. Damian had John. Damian hit John. Damian was playing games and using John to get to her. She was a pawn in his sick, twisted game of chess, and that pissed her off. Alex balled her fists tight again and began to breathe heavily. As her back rose and fell as she stood slumped over, Xander heard her growl. He ran over to his sister to check and see if she was alright, afraid that she may have turned into her more than slightly evil and twisted counter persona.

“Lex, are you okay?” Xander asked. Alex said nothing. She just stood there breathing heavily and growling. She was statuesque in her stance. She looked like the little girl from “The Ring” just all grown up and brown skinned.

“Lex?” Xander asked again. Alex twitched her head to the right. She heard him call her name and something within her stirred. “Lex, are you ok?” Xander asked once more. He was getting more concerned with every passing minute. Alex twitched her head to the right. “Lex!” Now he was very worried.

“The name’s Lexa!” a voice said. It sounded smoother and a little deeper than Alex’s voice. Who was this? This was Alex’s body that that was standing in front of him wasn’t it? Who’s Lexa?

“Lexa?” he asked with a small amount of fear in his voice. Alex was powerful, Alexandria was more powerful, and now Lexa? He didn’t know who she was. Alex lifted her head; a thin layer of hair still covered her face. She quickly opened her eyes. Xander saw something that he never wanted to see, one crimson red eye. Xander shook in fear and reached for the gun that he stashed in his belt, and cocked it. Alex flipped her head back, causing the remaining hair to fall into place. She hung her head slightly and moved her eyes upward to look at Xander.

“Lex?” he asked again. She slowly raised her head and looked into his eyes and smiled an evil smile. Xander let out a gasp and a small shiver went up his spine. He couldn’t believe the eyes that looked back at him. Her left eye was red and the other was a deep honey brown.

“Lex?” he asked with more confusion in his voice. Alex shook her head slowly with an evil smile on her face. “Lexa?” he asked. This time Alex nodded her head. Xander looked at his sister up and down. She looked like her, but this wasn’t Alex, nor was it Alexandria. He was so entranced at the new person standing in front of him that when she spoke he shook.

“I’m the best of both worlds before you ask.” Lexa said.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I’m what happens when Alexandria and Alex come together. All the bitch and bite without the murderous attitude.” She smiled. She’s a hybrid mix of the two of them. That’s why her eyes are two different colors. I wonder what brought this along. Xander thought to himself.

“I was brought here out of necessity. I’m what happens when they both stop fighting each other and decide to work together. Now let’s go, we have work to do. First I have to change.” Lexa walked up the stairs to the bedroom. She went into the closet and grabbed a black tank top, some black jeans with a chain that clipped onto her belt loop, a pair of fingerless leather studded driving gloves, and some black, knee high lace up boots. Lexa changed into the clothes she picked out and headed downstairs. Xander looked at her and smiled a smug smile.

“What are you going to do to Damian in 5 inch heels?” he snickered.

“More than you know. You wanna try me?” she asked slickly. Xander’s smiled disappeared. Lexa was like Catwoman, a woman on a mission, and right now that mission was 6’4” with a country accent and a cute smile. She straightened her spine and looked at Xander.

“Come on, we need something to roll out in.” she told him. Xander headed towards the front door. He felt Lexa’s hand around his wrist pulling him in the opposite direction.

“I thought you said you were leaving.” Xander stated.

“I did. I didn’t say anything about taking the car.” She smiled at him. Xander looked at her with a look of confusion.

“Then how are we going to get there?” he asked. He was just short of saying “Duh dummy!” but he was unsure of Lexa’s amount of humor. Lexa laughed. Her laughed sounded like exactly just what she was, a mix of Alex and Alexandria.

“Hmm I guess you don’t know everything. Follow me.” She smiled and led Xander into the garage.

“I didn’t even know she had a garage. I never cared to look.” Lexa looked at him and shook her head. She walked over to the side and pressed a button. When she pressed it the floor in the center of the garage separated and a platform started to rise from the bottom. When the platform was completely raised, there were two motorcycles. They were both Suzuki GSXR 750s. One was red and black and the other was black, silver, and blue. Xander was in absolute awe as he looked the bikes over. Lexa walked over to the wall and pressed another button. A panel in the wall turned to show two motorcycle jackets with matching helmets. She grabbed the red and black jacket and put it on. When Xander turned to look at what she was doing she threw the jacket at him.

“Here, you’re going to need this too.” She told him as she threw the helmet at him.

“Thanks.” He said. “How did you know about all this and I didn’t?” Lexa didn’t speak she put the helmet visor down and pointed to her head. She then climbed on the bike, Xander followed suit. She opened the garage and started the bike.

“Let’s roll.” She said and peeled out of the garage with Xander right behind her. Before she merged onto the highway she popped a wheelie and rode into the night with Xander behind her to get what belonged to her.

They rode up to the old warehouse and parked. Lxa got off of he bi and took off her helmet. She looked the building up and down. The building looked old and run down. The windows were boarded up and the door was open. He must have left it open for them. Lexa looked over at Xander and motioned for them to walk in. As they walked in Lexa looked around, her night vision was better that Xander’s and Alex’s had always been better than Damian’s. She heard a board creak behind her and turned around quickly.

“Hello my love.” Damian greeted sweetly. He looked into Lexa’s eyes and his widened. “Who are you? You are not my Alexandria!” he growled.

“Aww what is it Damian? Scared that your little plan didn’t work?” Lexa taunted with a slick smile. She loved that Damian was thrown off. “So you thought you could make Alex remember her past, bring Alexandria out of her and wreak havoc on the world without Alex having a backup plan?” she laughed. Damian glared at her and growled and headed towards a light switch. He angrily flipped it and illuminated the empty room. It was very big and there were some tables scattered around. It must have been the main sewing room. In the middle of the room was John. He was tied to a chair and his head hung down lifelessly, bloody and bruised.. Lexa gasped as she looked at John and fell to her knees. She started to breathe heavily. She rested her body on her hands and shook. Once her body stopped shaking she spoke.

“You said you wouldn’t hurt him.” She said weakly. She sounded like Alex again. Damian smiled an evil smile.

“There you are, ‘Alex’.” Alex looked up at Damian. He stared deeply into her honey brown eyes. He could sense what was going on within her. He was always able to do that and it made her sick. “So you thought you could create a new persona to come and face me? Silly girl. Nice attempt though, I was almost upset. By the way, I said I wouldn’t kill him. I just roughed him up a bit. Clearly he’s still alive Alex” He laughed. John weakly raised his head.

“Alex? Why are you here?” he asked in a weak and raspy voice. Alex couldn’t bear to look at his face. His eye was blackened, his lip busted and bloody, his cheek bruised, he looked so defeated and it was all her fault. Their eyes met and her heart squeezed. This was all because of her, because she didn’t listen.

“I’m here to save you.” She told him weakly as she looked down at the ground.

“Alex he says he’s a vampire! How r u going to beat him? Run while you can!” he yelled weakly. Damian laughed evilly and loudly.

“Tell him!” he yelled.

“No!” she whispered. She looked up at Damian and repeated herself.”No!” she said louder this time. She narrowed her eyes and Damian punched John in the face.

“Tell him!” he screamed again. Alex hesitated.

“No!” she yelled again. Damian smiled and hit John again. Alex jumped when she heard the impact of Damian’s fist against John’s jaw.

“Tell him what you are! Tell him!”

“No!”

“So you want him to die? Tell him or I kill him!” Damian threatened. He smiled a slick smile as he walked slowly behind John. He leaned over him and opened his mouth only inches from his neck. His fangs gleamed in the light and he smiled an evil smile as he leaned in closer. He sniffed John’s neck and saw John shiver.

“Tell him or I kill him, and he smells delicious!” he laughed.

“Tell me what, Alex!” John yelled shakily. Her heart squeezed again as she saw the fear and pain in his eyes. Damian inched closer to his neck. Alex could smell and hear John’s pulse racing. She looked over at Xander, who was too scared to move because he thought if he did Damian might kill John.

“Fine!” she yelled. “Fine.” she repeated in a defeated whisper as her head hung low. Damian laughed.

“Tell him what you are.” He said in a cruel calm voice with his fangs just barely touching his neck.

“John.” She whispered. “I’m-I’m a—”

“Tell him or he dies!” he yelled again.

“I’m a vampire!” she rushed. Damian let out a laugh.

“Now was that so hard?” he taunted.

John looked at Alex, who was now on her knees sobbing. “Is it true?” he asked her weakly. Alex couldn’t do anything but nod her head as her body shook violently. Damian laughed and cut the ropes that bound John to the chair and slid his weak body over to her she pulled him into her arms. He walked over to her and kneeled down near her ear.

“I will see you again my love.” He whispered. A loud whoosh went past her ear. She didn’t have to turn around; she knew Damian had gone, leaving nothing but chaos and destruction in his wake. She looked at John who was lying in her lap looking up at her, too weak to move. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He tried again to speak and he slipped into unconsciousness. Alex pulled him closer to her and whispered “I’m sorry” in his ear. Xander ran over to her and pulled at her arm.

“I called an ambulance, but we have to go, NOW!” he said as he tried to pull Alex from John. She gently placed his body on the floor and rushed out of the building and hopped on her bike and reluctantly sped off.

They rode the back way to the hospital and stopped in the back parking lot. Alex stood next to her bike and looked up at the back of the hospital she could smell exactly where John was. She stared blankly into the window that belonged to his room while Xander rambled on about Damian.

“What does he gain from outing you to John? Lex? Lex!” Alex snapped out of her trance and looked at Xander.

“Easy, he gets me alone and vulnerable for me to hate humans again, just like before.” She said solemnly.

“How is outing you to John going to do that?”

“He planned on John hating me for lying to him and fearing me because of what I am. That alone would cause him to alienate and hate me, and in turn leaving me heartbroken once again and cause me to hate humanity.” Xander looked at his sister and his heart wanted to break for her. He was helpless in relieving the pain that he was feeling through the connection that they shared. She really cared for John and if she lost him, the whole world might be in trouble.

“I have to see him, even if it’s for one last time.” She told him as she stood against her bike looking up towards the sky. Alex dropped her head and looked at John’s window.

“Well how do you plan to do-” his sentence was interrupted by a whoosh and he saw Alex running towards the building and disappeared into the tree that reached John’s window. Xander saw a shadow enter his window and he sighed.

The room was dimly lit. She looked at John laying there all bloodied and bruised as he was hooked up to an IV drip. This is entirely your fault. This would never have happened if you left him alone! She thought. She looked at John again, her heart felt as if it was shattered into a million pieces. The sound of the heart monitor reassured her that he wasn’t dead, and that made her feel a little better, until she realized that it was her fault he was there. She stood still in the corner by the window and just watched him.

Alex didn’t say a single word, didn’t move a single muscle. She stood there watching him as he slept. He looked so peaceful, with the exception of his many injuries, including a broken rib, a fractured arm, and the numerous cuts and bruises. Alex stood there for two whole hours before she saw John start to stir in his bed. He slowly opened his eyes and groaned. He looked around the room and his blurry vision landed on Alex. He gasped and tried to back away from her.

“Get away from me! What are you!” he yelled weakly. His heart monitor started beeping rapidly. Alex’s heart broke. She should have expected this.

“John calm down.” She said softly. John took a deep breath and calmed down as he heard her voice and his vision became clearer.

“Alex?” he asked. Alex nodded. “What are you? Are you really a-”

“Vampire? Yeah I am.” She interrupted. “It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.” She said sadly.

“Who was that Damian guy?” he asked.

“Damian is my ex-boyfriend from a long time ago.”

“How long is a ‘long time ago’?”

“About 120 years.”

“How old are you?” Alex cringed at the question. She decided to answer anyway.

“I’m 333 years old, and before you judge me I don’t feed on humans like Damian, so don’t worry you’re safe.” She said guiltily. John gave a slight chuckle.

“Come sit with me.” He requested. Alex pulled up the chair next to his bed and sat down. Alex looked at John, confusion filled her face.

“You’re not afraid of me?” she asked. John shook his head and tried to sit himself up. He winced in pain as he tried. He looked up at Alex and his eyes smiled.

“No, I’m not afraid of you. If you wanted to hurt me you would’ve done so by now. I just want to know why you didn’t tell me sooner.” He asked.

“Yeah right, I can just say ‘Hey John can I borrow your class notes and by the way I’m a vampire’. That doesn’t sound like something that you discuss in the hallway before class.” She was serious and John laughed.

“You’re right, but can I ask you a few questions?” Alex nodded and John started to ask her questions to sort the things that were reality and fantasy.

John and Alex played “Vampire facts 101” for over an hour dispelling common misconceptions of vampires or confirming things they’ve heard. After the last question John looked at Alex with a look that was mixed with anger, fear, and concern. She didn’t know how to read him.

“Why did you lie to me?” he asked. His voice sounded like he was hurt and his face said the same.

“I didn’t lie. I just didn’t tell you at all. You never asked me if I was a vampire.” She smiled sheepishly.

“True, but why didn’t you think you could trust me enough to tell me?” Alex gazed over John’s beaten body. He looked at his bandaged torso and nodded.

“Oh, that. Good point, but still you’re my girl; I think you’d have to share that eventually.” Just as soon as he finished his sentence, he had an epiphany. “Is it because of what you are that you didn’t go out with me the first time I asked you last year?” Alex nodded.

“I liked you, man did I like you, I just couldn’t put you in danger.” She looked at John’s body again and hung her head in shame. “Look what good that did me.” John grabbed her hand and moved over. He tugged Alex’s arm, and she climbed into the open space he just left next to him. She snuggled close to him, glad that he still wanted her around, and smiled as she breathed his scent deeply into her lungs.

“John?” she asked gently. John tuned his head to look at her.

“Yeah?”

“Why aren’t you running away and pushing me out of your life?”

“Easy, you’re still the same Alex that you were when I met you, just with fangs, red eyes, and superhuman powers.” He laughed at how ridiculous he sounded. “Alex? Do you remember anything from your past?” he asked seriously. Alex’s body stiffened ad she nodded slowly.

“I need you to tell me everything, now. I want to know it all from the beginning to the present. Don’t leave anything out, or things between us might change.” Alex’s body gave a slight shiver and she sighed.

“Ok, but you’re not going to like a good chunk of it. Promise me that no matter what, your opinion of me isn’t going to change.” Her voice shook as she waited for his answer. John looked deeply into her eyes and smiled.

“I promise.” John pulled Alex closer to him and kissed her on the forehead. Alex looked at John and her eyes started water. He didn’t judge her, or shun her for who she was. He didn’t run away or hate her; he just wanted her closer to him. This was something new to her. Maybe this could work out. She smiled to herself and looked at him.

“I guess I should start from the very beginning.”

"Missing"-Playlist

2009-11-28T05:52:00.001-05:00

This installment was inspired by the following songs:

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

"Missing"

2009-11-28T05:29:00.004-05:00

Xander looked at his sister lying there in her bed. How long had it been? Why wasn’t she awake yet? Did she miscalculate the dosage? His mind was swimming with questions. He looked over at the clock. Alex had only been out for five hours. She had another one to three hours left before she awakened. He was anxious. He thought back on the conversation they had about this day. He was just as unsure about the accuracy of this concoction then as he was now, but Alex was sure about so he had to be too. He slowly glanced over Alex’s still body. His eyes traveled to the bullet hole that was in his sister’s chest. He looked at it and shivered at what happened that brought that hole there. As if he could feel his gaze traveling, Alaska looked at the wound too. He let out a whimper and then looked at Xander.

“I guess I should get something to bandage that up, huh boy?” Xander looked at Alaska and nodded. “Watch her for me. I’ll be back in a second.” He told the dog as he got up from the bed and headed to Alex’s bathroom. He opened the cabinet door and took out the gauze, some tape, some antiseptic spray, and some clean towels and made his way back to Alex. He sat on the right side of the bed so he’d be closer to the bullet wound. He pulled Alex’s shirt back and winced. “I have to do this for Lex or this could get ugly.” He coached himself. He cleaned it out as best as he could and covered it with the gauze and the tape. “Now it looks like she got a tattoo instead of getting shot by her own brother to keep her from turning into a complete monster and wreaking havoc on all of Manhattan with her depraved vampire ex boyfriend.” Xander said to himself in one breath.

Xander sighed and looked at the clock. Only thirty minutes had passed since the last time he looked at it. This was getting ridiculous. He looked at Alex one more time and something around her neck caught his attention. “What’s this?” he asked as he touched the necklace around Alex’s neck. This is the necklace Damian gave her. Why does she have it on? He thought. Thinking it would help he reached around and took the necklace off. “I’m going to get rid of this once and for all.” With all his strength he tried to crush the necklace until it turned into what looked like silver dust. He got back up from the bed and flushed it down the toilet. He looked at Alex.” Sorry Lex, you’re gonna thank me later.” He whispered to himself. Xander walked back to the bed and went in Alex’s drawer in her bedside table and took out her Nintendo DSi. Video games always make time seem to pass faster.

Xander played Mario Brothers for what seemed like forever. He was really into. Just as he was about to face Baby Bowser he heard a groan. He looked over at Alex and she was still. He stared at her for a second. Alex groaned again, opened her eyes and grimaced. “Lex you’re awake!” he said excitedly. Alex turned her head to look at her brother then tried to sit up. “Here, let me help you.” Xander helped Alex sit up. Alex grabbed her shirt and looked at the bullet hole that was in it.

“Aww bloody hell!” she said in a raspy whisper with a slight English accent. “This was my favorite shirt!” Xander pulled the gun from off of the table and pointed it at Alex.

“Dude chill out it’s me.” She told him. This time her voice almost sounded as it was hers.
“If it’s really you, then what was the name of my imaginary friend when we were kids?” he asked hastily. Alex looked at him and then down at the bandage. She took it off and her face screwed up in pain.
“Bo Bo McMonkey. Now put that gun away because the last thing we both need is for you to accidently shoot me...again.” She said through clenched teeth. Xander lowered the gun and gave his sister a big hug.
“Welcome back!” Alex shook. She was in pain and Xander wanted to throw all his weight on her. “Oops, sorry Lex.” He smiled sheepishly.
“I take it by the bullet hole in my favorite shirt the fact that I don’t recall anything from the past and the gaping bullet wound in my chest, I was right?”Alex asked as she pointed to the bullet wound. Xander nodded.
“Yep and she almost tried to call up John and eat him.” He said absently.
“What?! Did she call him? Is he ok?” she asked frantically.
“No, that’s when I shot her. Umm I mean you. Ugh you know what I mean.” He said frustrated.
“Yeah, sadly I do.” Alex laughed. Xander was comforted to have his sister back.
“Lex, I have something serious to ask you. How long have you been blacking out like this?” he asked seriously. Alex looked down at the bullet wound. She noticed the bullet didn’t fully disintegrate. It did its job now she was left with the hassle of getting the rest out.
“I don’t know. Oww. Two weeks I –Oww guess.” She said as she dug in her chest to retrieve the bullet. Once she freed it from her skin she threw it on the floor and lay down. She did too much and exhausted herself again.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Xander said heading to the microwave to retrieve the blood he’d put in there while she was digging out the bullet. He sat own ext to her and handed he a pouch of blood.
“Why so you could feel bad because you couldn’t help me? No thanks.” She said as she took a sip. Xander shook his head. He obviously disapproved of her thinking, but she was here now, but for how long? He didn’t want to think about Alexandria ever returning. He shrugged it off and looked at Alex. She was sleeping soundly. This time she was asleep by choice, being knocked out and going to sleep are two different things. Xander put the blanket back over her and walked out the room to let her sleep. He grabbed his phone out of his pocket and texted John.
It took about a week for Alex to recover from her brush with her other side. Xander wouldn’t let her leave the house until he was sure that she was ok and not going to turn into Alexandria again. He never left her side. Other people would have found that annoying, but it was her brother so she just dealt with it. She looked around the living room and then at Xander. She was going to go crazy if she was in the house one more minute.
“I don’t care what you say, I’m not letting you out.” He told her. Alex smiled.
“I’m not saying much of anything. Come on! I’m going crazy in here all day. I feel like an animal. No wait I take that back. At least Alaska gets to go outside.” She joked. Xander laughed. “See I’m better. I’m fine. Plus, who stays in on a Friday night anyway, especially when they have tickets to go see Trey Songz with her boyfriend?” she asked grouchily. Xander laughed.
“You like him?” he asked.
“Uh yeah! He’s a great singer and plus he’s drop dead gorgeous. Plus if I’m not there he’s gonna call me and ask me where I am.” She said with a slick smile.
“Whatever. Well call him and let him know you won’t be able to make it.” Xander joked. He didn’t know Alex was serious until he saw her grab her cell phone. She dialed a number and put her phone on speaker.
“Hello?”A man answered.
“Hey Trey, it’s Alex. I just wanted you to know that I can’t make your show tonight because my brother is holding me hostage because I was sick and he doesn’t believe I’m ok now.” She explained.
“Aww well that’s too bad baby girl. You ok?” Trey asked concerned.
“Yeah I’m fine. I just didn’t want you to think I ditched you and forgot.”
“Aww no problem baby. I hope you feel better though. I got go right now, but I’ll text you later and send you a video of your favorite song.”
“Ok by Trey.” She hung up and looked at Xander, who’s mouth was wide open in shock.
“Two years ago he saw me in a club and we hung out for a bit and talked. He liked me enough to give me his number and we’ve been friends ever since.” She laughed. Her and Xander laughed about old” Trey and Alex” stories for two whole hours then her phone rang.
“I swear that’s how it happened. Hey baby!” she laughed.
“Wow now that’s the type of greeting I like.” A voice said. It wasn’t John. Alex’s face turned pale and he body froze.
“Damian. Where’s John?” Alex asked slightly frightened.
“Oh, John’s fine…for now.” Damian told her coldly.
“I want to speak to him.” She demanded.
“Well someone’s getting a little demanding. I would let you talk to him, but he’s a little tied up right now. I’m going to let him live…for now. SO don’t worry your pretty little head love, but if you want to save your little boyfriend you’ll have to do exactly what I tell you.” He demanded devilishly. She hated being at Damian’s mercy, but she had to save John. That was her main priority.
“Fine. What do you need me to do?” she asked angrily through clenched teeth.
“That is simple my dear. I’m going to call you soon with instructions on how to find your little boy toy then you can have him.”
“That sounds way too simple even for you Damian.” She smiled smugly.
“Oh, but that’s not all my sweet. There’s more once you get here.” He teased. Alex hated when he played games with her. “I’ll call you in a few, darling.” Then he hung up.
“That was Damian?” Xander asked shocked.
“Yeah, and he has John.” Alex said staring at her cell phone. She was scared to even think about what Damian had planned for her, but more scared of what he was going to do to John.
“He said John is fine I just have to follow his instructions and he lives.”
“Well what does he want?”
“I don’t know yet. He told me to wait. Damian’s too smart for us to pull off anything, and he knows that. So we’re going to do the only thing we can do…wait.” Alex looked up at Xander and they both stared at each other. They were completely at Damian’s will if they wanted John to be safe. So they both sat there quietly, waiting, waiting for the phone to ring again with their instructions.

"I Am My Sister's Keeper"-Playlist

2009-11-27T22:55:00.002-05:00

This installment was inspired by the following songs:

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

"I Am My Sister's Keeper"

2009-11-27T22:54:00.002-05:00

Xander watched as Alex walked into the house. She didn’t look like herself. What is going on with her? He thought. Alex looked at Xander and then gave him a sly wink and a smile and headed upstairs. This wasn’t good and he knew it. They haven’t talked about Damian at all. “I wonder if she even cares anymore.” He said to himself. Maybe she’s just freaked out and trying to avoid the situation. He thought. Either way he was worried about her. He then thought about the phone call he’d gotten from John about how he noticed there was something wrong with Alex as well. Xander was surprised that he’d actually call him. Alex told him that she gave John his number in case of emergencies, but he never thought he’d actually use it. As he remembered the conversation he felt the need to talk to Alex about whatever is happening with her. Before he knew it he felt himself making his way towards Alex’s room. When Xander reached the door he knocked softly.

“Just a second.” Alex yelled on the other side. Xander heard a rustling and something he couldn’t make out. “Come in.”

“Lex we need to talk.” Xander said as he entered her room. Her room still looked the same. Alex was on her bed painting her nails a blood red color. He took a deep breath and began.

“Lex, I’ve noticed that you haven’t quite been yourself these past few weeks.” He started. Alex didn’t bother looking up at him.

“What do you mean?” she asked looking down while painting her toenails.

“I mean you’ve just been different. You’ve been dressing different, and even talking different.”

“So, what, I decided to change my style up a little bit. Big whoop, alert the media!” Alex said as she leaned over to continue painting her toes.

“It’s not just that. I heard what happened at school with John today.” Xander said in his big brother voice with his arm crossed.

“Hmm if he called you then I must not have done it right. So what I made out with my boyfriend. I’ve been around a while Xander and I think that’s what a girl is supposed to do.”

“That’s not why he called me Lex and you know it. He’s worried about you just like I am. Lately you’ve been moody and acting like a vampire suffering from PMS, but I know it’s more than that.” Xander told her with a raised eyebrow.

“I’m no different than I used to be. So what I’m not scared to be me anymore. Is that wrong?” she asked with an attitude.

“There’s nothing wrong with it Lex, but you’ve crossed a line, and by my count more than just one!” his voice got louder. He was angry and hurt all at once. His sister was out of control and it killed him inside.

“What are you talking about?” Alex scoffed.

“What am I talking about? What am I talking about?” he asked angrily. Xander walked over to Alex’s closet and opened the door. The weakened body of the lab tech at the blood bank fell out.

“Oops. Now where did that come from?” she asked with a smile and faux innocence. Alex then laughed.

“Lex! This isn’t funny! What the hell is wrong with you? You never feed on people! This is not like you at all.” Xander’s eyes started to water as Alex laughed. His sister was turning back into the monster she was way back when. He wouldn’t let that happen to her again. He promised her and himself. Alex looked at the lab tech standing at the foot of her bed. She crawled over to him and sat on her knees and looked deeply into his eyes.

“Todd, you were never here. You don’t know how you got here and you will leave and forget everything from the past two days. If anyone asks where you were, you were visiting a friend from high school and decided to stay at his place. Now get out of here.” She waved him out and heard the front door close and a car start. Xander looked at his sister. What was happening to her? This wasn’t Alex. Xander then had a thought and decided to test his new found theory.

“Alexandria!” he called to Alex.

“Yes?” she responded with a smile as she flipped her hair when she turned her head and looked at him. Xander step back and faltered a bit. Alexandria smiled.

“What’s wrong Xander? Didn’t you miss me? I mean I am your sister.” She smiled an evil smile. Xander’s insides went cold at the sight of it.

“What are you doing here?” he asked strongly. He needed answers. She laughed again this was entertaining for her.

“Simple, ‘Alex’ wasn’t strong enough to hold me back. Trying to be the vampire with a heart, a cute attempt but it wasn’t quite enough.” She told Xander. Alexandria’s English accent threw Xander off. It was like looking into the past. They both had lost their accents over time, but it was if Alex never changed.

“What happened?” he asked concerned. “I want my sister back!” he yelled.

“Aww Xander I’m hurt. I am your sister, more than that weakling Alex ever was. Plus she couldn’t deal with the stress of all the secrets and when Damian showed up two weeks ago she really lost it. No control no wall. No wall, I’m free to enjoy all the things that I’ve been deprived of. I think I’m gonna stay a while. This is going to be fun.” She smiled evilly and licked her fangs. Xander couldn’t take it anymore. He couldn’t watch her come back and destroy the person that Alex tried so hard to be. He wouldn’t let her turn into who she used to be. He felt that he failed her because he let it get this far and did nothing. Xander’s body began to shake with anger and rage. He didn’t want to know this person. He wanted his sweet and non human feeding sister. He wanted Alex.

“Alexandria I want my sister back!” he growled through clenched teeth. His eyes turned crimson.

“Too bad you can’t have her back. And like I said, I am your sister, or have you forgotten?” she said smugly. Her words hit Xander like daggers, every word slicing into him.

“I wasn’t asking nicely.” He growled again. Alexandria looked at him and smiled a devilish smile.

“Now there’s my brother! There’s my partner in crime!” she yelled excitedly. Xander couldn’t take looking at her anymore. She looked like Alex but he knew that it wasn’t her.

“Hmm this John guy is pretty cute. And he smells delicious! I might just call him up so we can have dinner. Well at least me.” Alexandria laughed an evil laugh. It made Xander shiver inside. It was a noticeable contrast next to the red hot rage that was burning within him ready to explode. Alexandria picked up the phone and started to look for John’s number. Xander had to think fast. As his mind was racing he remembered something Alex told him a few days ago. He made his way towards the dresser. He frantically opened the third drawer on the left. As he searched through t-shirts he felt something cold. It was cold and metallic. His hand felt around the object. It was smooth and had a smooth handle. He felt around some more and felt it, the trigger. It was the gun that Alex told him about. She came up with a mixture of silver nitrate and a tranquilizer strong enough to take out a fully grown lion, and put it into a bullet. On impact the bullet shatters and the concoction is released into the body. The silver nitrate immobilizes the vampire and the tranquilizer knocked them out for about six to eight hours. Alex told him about this in case something like this happened. She knew what was going on with her. She must have to come up with something like this. He thought. He grabbed the gun. His heart jumped at what he had to do. He didn’t want to shoot his sister. He looked over at Alexandria, who was on the bed smiling evilly and was tapping through Alex’s phone searching for John’s number. Then she laughed an evil laugh.

“Found it.” She sang. Xander knew what had to be done he couldn’t wait any longer. He watched as Alexandria held up the phone to dial the number.

“Alexandria!” he yelled. He looked at her with pure hatred and pain in his crimson eyes. She looked at him and looked at the gun and started to laugh hysterically.

“And what are you going to do with that? Shoot me? Ha!”she laughed mockingly.

“Actually I am.” Xander said coolly. He cocked the gun. BAM! The gun fired and the bullet raced from the gun as if it hinted the urgency of the situation and made its new home right in Alexandria’s chest. She slumped over like a lifeless rag doll. Xander rushed over to her and saw that the tranquilizer was already taking effect. He looked into her eyes and he saw her. Alex. She smiled a slight smile at him and mouthed the words “Thank you” and then her eyes closed. Xander picked up his sister’s lifeless like body and laid it on the bed so that she was lying flat. He then sat beside her and watched her. For now one problem was out the way. He’d deal with everything else once she woke up. Hopefully she’d be herself again. He bent over and whispered into her ear.

“Alex, please come back to me. Please come back.” He sat back up and saw Alaska entered the room. He let out a whimper and jumped on the bed and rested his head on Alex’s stomach. Alaska looked at Xander with a look of concern. “I did what I had to do boy.” He told Alaska. He petted him on the head. “And now we wait.” He leaned back on the headboard and looked at Alex. Alaska rested his body and together they both waited, anxious to see what happens next.

"Evil's Playmate"-Playlist

2009-11-26T02:41:00.000-05:00

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

"Evil's Playmate"

2009-11-26T02:37:00.000-05:00

It was a little over two weeks since Damian came through Alex’s window and whispered for her to remember who she was. Ever since then she’s been acting very unlike herself. I t was almost as if she didn’t remember or care about Damian and what he was planning. Xander was worried about her, but Alex paid him no mind.

“I’m worried about her. The last time she got like this it didn’t turn out good for anyone. It’s only going to get worse since she’s decided to date John. They’re almost inseparable. This whole thing with Damian is getting out of hand. Something needs to happen fast before someone gets hurt, or even worse, killed. Plus she skipped class today.” Xander said worried as he patted the top of Alaska’s head as he was leaving Alex’s room. Xander looked at Alex as she stirred in bed.

“You know I can feel you looking at me and it’s getting very irritating. I can’t sleep with your eyes boring a hole in my head. And FYI all my morning classes were cancelled today.” Alex said groggily. She was grumpier than usual. Xander made a mental note of this and walked away. Alex pulled the blanket over her head and growled. Why was it that she felt like crap? Her vision was blurred and her head throbbed. She felt hung-over, but she hadn’t been drinking. Alex pulled herself out of bed and shuffled over to her mini fridge in the corner of her room. She opened it and pulled out a pouch of blood. She heated it up in her microwave and took it out after it dinged. Instead of grabbing a crazy straw she took the tab in between her teeth and ripped the pouch open, tilted her head back, and downed it all in one gulp. Blood overflowed her mouth and started to drip from her lips, the corners of her mouth, and her chin. She then let out a refreshed “Ahh” and looked in the mirror. She watched the blood drip onto her blue pajama tank top drop by drop, dazed as she watched the fabric suck in each drop as if it were one big straw. An evil smile crossed her blood soaked mouth and she saw it. It was only a glimmer but she saw it in her eyes. She saw Alexandria, the blood thirsty monster that once took over her life. Alex worked so hard to keep her at bay and she’d been doing a good job for over 120 years. What had changed now? Startled she grabbed a towel and cleaned off her mouth. She looked in the mirror again and saw herself this time in the reflection. Was she losing control? No she couldn’t be. She kept Alexandria locked away never to be released again. Alex started to feel dizzy. She walked over to the bed and lay down. Alex closed her eyes and allowed herself to spin into a realm of unconsciousness. It was then that she let the effect of the blood take over. Her mind was in a frenzy. Thoughts of Damian, Jacques, John, Alexandria, and the past all spun around in her head. Her eyes shot open and she stared at the ceiling. She looked around confused. Where was she? Her mind registered that she was home.

“What the hell is happening to me?” she asked herself frightfully. She walked over to the bathroom and got into the shower. When she was finished she dried herself off and looked inside her massive closet. What to wear? What to wear? She thought. She looked at all her shirts and jeans. “This will just not do. I need something sexier.” Alex said. That’s when she saw it. A black and red corset with leather and lace trim. “Yummy.” She said to herself with a smile. She slid on her very well fitting black jeans, and her thigh high black stiletto studded boots that had three dangling chains hanging from them. She then slithered herself and laced herself into her corset. She looked in the top drawer of her night table and took out the necklace Damian gave her. She slid it around her neck and clasped it. Alex made her way back into the close and grabbed her chain belt and made sure that they draped just right around her booty. She looked in the mirror and applied her “Killer” lip gloss. It was her favorite shade and flavor. Alex gave herself one more look over. “Damn I’m good.” She said with a sexy smile and went downstairs car keys and leather jacket in hand. When she passed Xander she felt his eyes on her.

“Lex? Are you feeling ok?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. Alex turned to her brother and smiled an evil smile.

“I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be? I feel great!” she opened the door and left. She loved the fact that she had nothing but her 2 afternoon classes. As she was going to school Alex put on her sunglasses and looked out her window. The sun was out, but that didn’t bother her. The whole drive she didn’t think about Damian or any other drama in her life. She smiled to herself.

“I’m not going to let him rain on my parade. He’ll be dealt with accordingly at my own convenience. Let him know who’s running this show.” She said to herself. Alex looked up and saw that she was in the city now. The buildings looked sharper and more beautiful today. What was it? Alex shrugged it off and pulled into the school parking lot. All eyes were on the car. No one’s really seen her drive it, but they knew who it belonged to. When she parked she sexily exited like she was a celebrity. She flipped her hair and looked around. All eyes were on her. It was like she was a rock star or something. People were mesmerized. She felt the air around her and decided to leave the jacket in the car. She started walking towards her building to go to class, even though she did have time to hang out if she felt she needed to. Alex looked around the yard and saw John and walked towards him. As soon as Alex came into eye range John’s jaw dropped and his group of friends took notice. They all turned to see what had John so shocked. Their eyes widened when they saw Alex walking towards them.

“Yo man is that Alex? Ha-ha baby is lookin’ good!” his one friend exclaimed. John shot his friend a stern look.

“Look man that’s my girl you droolin’ over and talkin’ ‘bout like that!”John said threateningly with a small smile. Alex made her way up to John and grabbed him and gave him a deep kiss. When they were finished John looked at her with a face of shock and satisfaction. If only Alex knew what he was thinking of doing to her right then and there, and it wasn’t sharing notes about class.

“What’s gotten into you?” he asked surprised. Alex pulled him closer to her and semi-whispered in his ear loud enough for his friends to hear.

“You could be if you play your cards right.” She teased. Then Alex bit his earlobe and tugged it seductively. She kissed his neck lightly. “I’ll see you in class lover boy. I’ve got business to attend to before class.” She said. She kissed John again and smiled. “Bye boys.” She waved and walked off.

“Damn John! What’s gotten into Alex? She’s-She’s-“

“HOT!” another one of John’s friends interrupted. John shot them both a side eye.

“First off both of ya’ll pick your jaws up off the floor. Second I don’t know. This isn’t like her. She’s been acting this way since a week ago and it’s been on and off. It’s like she’s two different people.” With that he got a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. John reached into his pocket and grabbed his cell phone and made a call. The phone rang and a man answered.

“Xander? It’s John we need to talk. It’s about Alex.”

Previous Installment Playlists

2009-11-24T16:27:00.000-05:00

I decided to post the previous installments' playlist here for the same reason I post the playlists separately from the installments.Enjoy!=)

"Forever Is Too Long"-Playlist

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

"The Past is Never the Past"-Playlist

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

One Door Opens.....-Playlist

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Nightmares of a Monstrous Past-Playlist

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

The Music Playlists

2009-11-23T04:08:00.000-05:00

Since some of my friends can't reach a computer, or want to read the story while they are away from one, I decided to post the playlists separately so they can read it from their phones. The music will be the post before the installment it inspired. I also think that adding the playlist before the story will allow you guys to see ahead of time the feel of the upcoming installment.I hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it.

~*~Evol_1~*~

"Forgotten to Only be Remembered"-Playlist

2009-11-23T03:32:00.000-05:00

This installment was inspired by the following songs:

MySpace Playlist at MixPod.com

"Forgotten to Only be Remembered"

2009-11-23T03:30:00.000-05:00

Alex looked out her window. It was very cloudy outside. It looked as if someone threw a grey down feather comforter across the sky. The sun tried it’s hardest to shine, but to no avail. This weather was perfect for vampires that had to go out during the daytime. The sun didn’t bother Alex as much as it did others, and she didn’t know why. All she knew was other vamps tried to avoid the sun and would get sores that resemble sunburns and get sick, some would burst into flames. It was a change thing and she really didn’t understand it. What she did understand was that she was different, the sun just hurt her eyes a little and made her a little dizzy, but it was tolerable. She was thinking about her life and everything happening now, and started to feel anxious. Alex started breathing heavily and with a whoosh was out the window. Xander, worried that his sister had run away jumped out the window and landed feet first on the soft ground below. He landed so gracefully, it was almost as if he floated down. Alex had always been faster than he was, so he couldn’t just run after her. Xander sniffed the air and then moved back away from the house and looked up. There was Alex, walking on the roof of the house, treating the line where the two sides connected as a tightrope with stiletto heels on. She looked so carefree and happy.

“Lex, get down! You’re just showin’ off!” Xander yelled with a smile.

“Oh stop! You’re just mad I beat you up here.” She yelled back laughing.

“Now Lex!”Xander commanded. There he was using that “older brother” voice. Alex then jumped down from the roof and with a flip and landed on her feet in front of her brother. She moved the hair out her face and smiled.

“There you happy you party pooper?” Alex said as she made her best spoiled little girl pout.

“Very.” Xander smiled. “So what’s with this John guy?” he asked seriously. Alex’s body stiffened. She looked at her brother intensely and muttered “Nothing. He’s just a guy who’s a friend.”

“Didn’t seem like that to me. Lex, are you sure you can have a human boyfriend again?” he asked seriously. She hated when he’d pop her little bubble of fantasy. In a perfect world she could be with John without worrying that she was going to rip his throat out, but this wasn’t a perfect world, and she was still dangerous to everyone living and undead.

“No one’s saying that I want to be with John, and neither is John. We’re just friends and that’s it. Yeah he’s cute, but I’ve learned my lesson from Jacques. I’m not going back there. I’m uncontrollable, and that makes me dangerous. I get that.” She said sullenly. Can’t blame a girl for dreaming. She thought to herself.

“Hey, I’m just lookin’ out for you. I don’t want you to turn back into who you were before either. I know things are hard for you, but I’m proud of you. No one said life was easy.” Xander said. He then grabbed Alex and hugged her. She hated that he was right, but it was for the best.

Alex heard something from afar and jumped. She was back on the roof in an instant. She looked out towards the road that was far from her house. She didn’t see anything, she grew tired of looking over her shoulder to see if Damian had shown up to ruin her life some more. Feeling drained again she laid down and looked towards the cloudy sky. She lay perfectly still, as if she was a fixture of the roof, and let her thoughts consume her.

“You’re in the middle of a huge mess.” She said aloud to herself. “How are you going to sort all this out AND deal with Damian?” Her life was upside down and was bound to get crazier. She was scared to close her eyes, afraid of the images and memories her sub conscious decided to bring up now. She was still a little shaken from the Jacques dream. Laying on the roof was the only thing that made her feel sane and in control. It was the only thing that made sense right now.

As she thought to herself she felt the time pass. When 6:30 pm rolled around, she shot up and jumped down from the roof. She was lucky she landed so softly, because Gucci boots weren’t cheap. Alex walked through the door to see Xander watching TV in the living room. She looked over at him and noticed Alaska was lying next to him on the couch with his head in his lap. Alaska never got along easily with anyone. Guess she senses something about Xander. Alex thought as she headed upstairs. When she reached her room she hopped in the shower and changed. She was wearing dark blue jeans, thigh high black stiletto boots. She loved theses boots they had studs on the buckles and the trim. She had on her favorite red shirt. She loved it because it showed enough cleavage to get attention without looking like a slut. She grabbed her leather jacket and headed downstairs. Xander took one look at her and blocked the door before she could reach it.

“And where do you think you’re goin’ dressed liked that?!” he asked wide eyed. Alex looked herself and up and down and laughed.

“This is nothing. I’m goin’ out to see a friend.” She made sure she emphasized the word “friend” .

“Umm I don’t know about you, but I’ve been around for a while and I’ve never seen any girl go out in her ‘freak me now’ now boots and her ‘look but can’t touch’ shirt!” Alex laughed at her brother. She loved seeing his reaction and also the fact that he said “freak me now boots” made her giggle.

“You forgot my ‘look at my apple bottom booty’ jeans.” Alex laughed then looked at Xander. He looked so serious but Alex could tell he was holding back from laughing. “Move from in front of the door.” She requested sweetly.

“No.” Xander said sternly. A sly smile appeared on Alex’s face and she crouched in an attack position. She didn’t like being told no.

“Move, Xander.” Alex demanded as she let out a growl.

“No, and don’t think you scare me. I’m not scared of you.” He smiled a slick smile and crossed his arms.

“You don’t have to be scared. I’m stronger and faster. Do you really want to test me?” Alex threatened.

“Ugh! Fine! Just be careful will ya?” he said as he moved from the door.

“Of course. Always. See ya later.” Alex smiled as she put on her jacket and headed out the door, car keys in hand. She climbed into her car and drove off while Xander stood in the doorway. He worried about his sister; he had no choice but to. Xander closed the door and looked at Alaska, who was looking at him confused. He sat down next to him and Alaska put his head on his leg and looked up at him. Xander petted his head. “I’m worried about her too. This is how she acted the last time. I just hope this time she can control herself. Damian here isn’t going to help either.” He told Alaska. They both looked at each other, and as if Alaska could comprehend what Xander just told him, let out a whimper.

Alex looked around the food court and saw John standing and waving at her. If she could blush she would have. She walked over to him trying to seem normal with a little dash of sexy. As soon as she was in eye range she felt heads turn to her she might as well have been walking in slow motion. She looked at John and saw his eyes widen he quickly tried to shake it off b4 she reached the table. Alex smiled a smile to herself and walked over to him.

“Hey John.” She greeted confidently.

“Umm hey Alex.” John stumbled. He tried to look and sound cool but he couldn’t keep his eyes from examining every inch of her body. Alex looked around as if she didn’t feel John’s eyes traveling her body. She smiled at him.

“John, are you feeling ok?” she asked with a smile.

“Huh? Yeah, I’m good. You look nice today. You don’t look too sick to me.” He said coolly. If she didn’t know better, she’d think he was flirting.

“Thanks.” She said as she sat down. She looked down on the table and saw a whole pizza and a notebook.

“I bought some pizza. Hope you don’t mind. I’d just figure you’d want to eat and I heard Pizza Hut was your favorite.” How did he know you liked Pizza Hut? Hmm maybe you told him before. She thought.

“Thanks. I could eat a little. That was nice of you.” She smiled and grabbed a slice of pizza. She looked down and saw that the pizza was pepperoni and pineapple stuffed crust, her favorite. How the heel did he know this? I never told him this. She thought to herself. She didn’t know that she was holding the slice of pizza and looking very confused. John smiled at her and spoke.

“Before you get too creped out, I saw you scribble it in your notebook one time when I had to borrow your notes. I like reading what you write in your margins. Some of it’s funny and some are really thought provoking. I look forward to them whenever I borrow your notebook. Speaking of notebooks…” He smiled nervously and passed her his. “I already bookmarked the page where today’s notes start.

“Thanks. You didn’t have to.” She smiled. They talked and ate pizza for hours. This isn’t so hard. This is actually pretty easy. This might be able to work. Alex thought. She was deep in her thoughts of what could be and then John grabbed her hand across the table. She could feel John’s pulse, slow and steady. He was relaxed around her. She could feel the blood flowing through his body. She could smell him and he smelled delicious. Like chocolate covered strawberries. Alex’s body stiffened and her eyes widened as she got flashbacks of her past, about Jacques, and about Damian. She was then shot back into reality and quickly moved her hand. She looked up and across the cafeteria she saw Damian. He was smiling at her and waved. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath and looked again. He was gone. Had he really been there watching her? If he was, how long had he been there? Alex looked at John in the eyes and saw that he looked hurt. Alex quickly gathered her things and his notebook and stood up suddenly.

“Alex, are you ok? Was it something I did?” John asked concerned. Alex wanted to tell him that she was ok and he was ok, but she couldn’t she had to leave, especially if Damian was watching her.

“No. It’s not you. I’m fine, promise. I have to go. I’m not feeling too good. Thanks for the notes and the pizza. I’ll see you tomorrow in class.” Alex told him hastily. She sounded afraid. She left quickly out of the food court with John looking confusedly after her.

“What the hell just happened?!” Alex said aloud to herself in the car as she drove home. She tried to collect herself as best as she could, but it just wasn’t working. Her thoughts raced through her just as the scenery around her had. Before she knew it she was home and in her driveway. She turned off her car and just sat there. As much as she tried to push what happened out of her mind, she couldn’t. She saw Damian. She knows she did. Alex gathered herself and went straight upstairs to her room, Alaska trotted close behind her with Xander. Xander knocked on her door and let Alaska in.

“Lex, are you okay?” he asked concerned. He worried a lot about his sister.

“Yeah I’m fine. What makes you think anything is wrong?” she asked sounding a little frazzled.

“Lex, I’m your twin. I can feel when you’re happy or stressed, or anything. Was it that John guy?”

“No! I’m just a little stressed out from school right now. I missed a lot today, so I’m behind.” She lied.

“Oh ok. If you need me I’m downstairs. Ok?”

“Yeah, thanks Xander.”She hated lying to her brother, but she couldn’t tell him yet. She didn’t even know what was going on herself. She couldn’t tell Xander what she knew, not until she figured out what was going on. She looked down on her bed and looked at John’s notebook. She felt a small tug on what was supposed to be her heart and picked up her phone. John called three times and left a voicemail. She called her voicemail and listened to his message.

“Hey, Alex it’s John. I don’t know what happened, but I was just calling to see if you were ok. So when you get this can you call me back please so I can know you’re ok. Thanks. Bye.” Alex smiled. He didn’t think she was weird, he was just worried. She sent John a text saying: I’m ok. Thanx 4 caring. I’m gonna to get sum rest. See u 2morrow. Alex the n grabbed his notebook and copied the notes until she fell asleep. Xander stopped by her room and covered his sister with a blanket and laid her in her bed the way she usually slept, turned off the light, and left.

It was around 2am when Alex felt a breeze on her sleeping body from her open bedroom window. Her mind awakened slightly to register that she closed the window earlier. She mentally shrugged it off and pulled the covers closer to her. The room had gotten colder, and there was a slight feeling of something dark in the room. A dark shadowy figure with crimson eyes stood at the foot of her bed. He smiled and his fangs glowed in the moonlight. He laughed to himself about the fact that she was unaware of his presence. Damian walked over to the side of her bed. He climbed stealthily into her bed and lay next to her and watched her sleep. She looks so peaceful. Damian thought as he looked down at his long lost love. He got up and walked to the other side of the bed. He looked at her bedside table and found the necklace he had given her long ago in the top drawer. Damian smiled an evil smile and bent over her. He whispered into the ear of the sleeping Alex, a whisper so cold that it sent a chill up Alex’s spine; one word that would stir her in her sleep.

“Remember.” Then he left and closed the window behind him and disappeared into the night.

Remember.

"Nightmares of a Monstrous" Past

2009-11-19T00:52:00.000-05:00

The air was warm and muggy. It was a warm summer night and the sky was clear. The smell of fire thickened the air. For any normal person it would’ve almost seemed difficult to breathe. Alex stood in the middle of a road in Paris, France dressed in a black skirt and a red and black leather bustier. The streets were lined with people screaming and running for their lives. Something was after them, and it was gaining ground quick.

Alex looked up at the stars and then over at the illuminated Eiffel Tower. She closed her eyes and sniffed the air. The smell of fear and desperation were in the air. Just then something within Alex clicked and she swept her head down and looked to the side with an evil smile. Her fangs gleamed in the pale light of the night combined with the soft glow of streetlights. Something caught her scent and made her mouth water. She craved this, need the blood that was calling her name. Alex took a step forward and continued to walk past the crowd of screaming people on the cobbled street. Alex swayed slightly as she walked, high off the scent that was drawing her. It seemed as if she had no control, she was like a zombie as she walked. Just then she stopped. Alex looked around puzzled. She had lost the scent. She sniffed the air again to see if it was possible to find it again, and found it. Her eyes turned a bright crimson and she spun quickly to her right, towards a dimly lit alleyway. Alex stealthily walked to the opening to the alley. When she reached the alley she saw a man trembling in the corner in the very back. It was a dead end. What was he doing here? If he was hiding, this was the stupidest place to hide. “Trapped like a rat.” Alex said devilishly. He looked up at the sound of Alex’s voice.

“Alexandria?” he asked terrified. “What happened to you?” he asked as his voice trembled. Alex looked her love in his piercing blue eyes and smiled a hellish smile. “I’m just being who I’ve always been Jacques.” Alex said as she licked her fangs. “Now sit still this is only going to hurt for a second.” She said calmly and then laughed. Jacques stood up and looked Alex deep into her eyes as she walked towards him slowly. What happened to his love? What was she doing? As Alex got closer Jacques found the courage to say what would be his last words. He looked Alex dead into her eyes with so much love and warmth and uttered just three words. “I love you.” He said in a whisper that only they both could hear. Alex cocked her head n smiled then she lunged towards Jacques.

“NO!” Alex screamed as she shot up from her bed with her eyes still closed. Xander was across the room watching TV and rushed to his sister’s side and grabbed her into his arms. She was shaking almost violently.

“Lex it’s ok. It’s ok.” Xander kept whispering to her as he rocked her to calm her down. Alex was on the verge of tears and looked up at her twin brother. Xander looked down at Alex wit h a serious face of concern.

“Another bad dream?” he asked. Alex nodded slowly. “The same one?” he asked again. Alex shook her head and pointed to his pouch of blood. He handed it to her and she took a long sip. She swallowed and let out a small “Ahhh”.

“Then what dream was it, Lex?” he asked sternly. Alex looked up at Xander with fear and regret in her eyes. She shivered and let out one single word.

“Jacques.” She said in a low whisper as she hung her head down low. Xander’s eyes became very wide and let out a small sigh.

“You’ve never had that one before had you?” he asked. Alex really didn’t feel like answering any questions right now so she shook her head slightly. She put her face in her hands and breathed deeply. She needed to get it together. She knew taking a nap after telling Xander everything about Damian would have some effect on her. She looked at the clock on her night table and looked at the time. It was only 1pm. That makes sense since she got back home at 7am. She looked at the clock in a trance for a little bit trying to recollect the events between the time she talked to Xander to now. Just as she was remembering her cell phone rang. Xander looked at her curiously. “What do you need that for?” he asked. Alex shushed him and answered.

“Hello.” She answered casually.

“Hey Alex it’s John.” The male voice replied. John. He was the really cute guy in her music engineering class; they both majored in Recorded music. He was tall, around 6’4” and had really nice milk chocolate caramel skin. He also had an accent that was country that every girl thought was cute.

“Hey John what’s up?” Alex asked. She and John had become friends when he forgot his notes in his dorm room and Alex helped him out. Since then they’d been study partners, project partners, etc.

“I was just calling to see if you were ok. You weren’t in class today.” He said concerned. John was a sweet country boy. Momma raised him right. Alex thought to. “No, I’m fine. My brother came to town and I wasn’t feeling too good today so I didn’t come to class. Did I miss anything?” she asked him casually. Their friendship was simple and safe. To Alex that was very comforting in more ways than one.

“Yeah a lot, but don’t worry I took really good notes so you won’t be behind. This time you’re gonna need my notes instead of the other way around. That is if you can read my handwriting.” John laughed.

“I’m sure I’ll be able to figure ‘em out. Nothing’s too illegible for me.” She laughed.

“Ok. Well if you’re feeling up to it, do you want to stop by later and pick ‘em up so you’re not behind if you come to class tomorrow?” John asked. Alex wanted to say no and skip classes for the rest of the semester while Damian was around, but school, writing, and music were the only things keeping her sane, aside from Alaska.

“Sure. I’ll meet you at the food court at 8.”

“Great. See ya then.” They both hung up. Xander looked at her with a sly smile.

“So who’s that, your boyfriend?” He asked teasingly.

“No. He’s my friend and that’s it.” Alex knew she was lying. She had some kind of feelings for john, but that was dangerous and she couldn’t act on them even if she wanted to. She wasn’t stable, she wasn’t safe, hell she wasn’t human. She figured if they stayed friends no one would get hurt. Her last boyfriend was now stalking her, and the last human she’d loved she ripped his throat out just for kicks and giggles. She was a heartless monster and she’d promise she’d never go back. She refused to put John or anyone in that situation ever again. She swore to never have any human, lover or friend, end up like Jacques. She couldn’t have anyone else’s blood on her hands. She couldn’t deal with another Jacques, not now, not ever.

"One Door Opens....."

2009-11-17T14:35:00.000-05:00

Alex drove for what seemed forever. She had a lot to think about. Damian was back and she didn’t know why. She didn’t know anything, but she did know was that it wasn’t anything good. Damian wasn’t anything good and neither was anything he brought with him. She knew how Damian was and she never wanted to relive that ever again. “You cannot escape who you are” echoed throughout her mind. Alex didn’t want to remember who she was. Escaping is what she was trying to do. She knew that she had to stay away from Damian and stop whatever he was trying to do. “Stupid vampire exes!” she said aloud to herself as she kept driving. She didn’t have the luxury of looking out the window to watch the transformation of her surroundings change. Actually, everything was a blur. It looked like picture was taken as the car was speeding to the destination. This is why she knew springing for the R8 would come in handy.

Alex finally reached her driveway and parked her car in front of the house. She just wanted to get inside so she could think and sort things out. She needed a nice warm pouch of B+ and a crazy straw. Alex smiled a small smile at the thought of drinking B+ in a very negative situation. With that thought in her head she went in the house. Alaska wasn’t there to greet her as he always had been. “Hmm guess he didn’t hear me pull up.” She thought aloud. Alex called for her furry companion but he didn’t come. “Alaska, here boy.” she called again. Now she was worried. He always came when called. He was always at the door. Just then Alex got a very unsettling feeling in her stomach. She sniffed the air and smelled a scent that was familiar. Was it Damian? No he wouldn’t be that stupid to show up here at her home. Or would he? There’s never any way to tell with a crazy vampire in love, especially when that vampire was Damian. Alex sniffed the air again. No it wasn’t Damian, but she knew this scent. She carefully went up the stairs to her bedroom to look for Alaska. As she went up the stairs the scent got stronger. When she reached her room her stomach clenched. She slowly placed her hand on the doorknob and turned it just as slow. She slowly and carefully opened the door. When she had the door open far enough to see inside she gasped as she saw someone on her bed petting Alaska.

“Hey Alexandria.” He greeted with a smile. Alex let out a low growl and rolled her eyes. She didn’t have time for this. What was this? “Get on Alex’s Nerves Day”? Why did everyone decide to pop up today? Alex collected her thoughts and spoke.

“Hello Xander.” She greeted flatly as she watched Xander pet and play with Alaska. Xander was the last person besides Damian she wanted to deal with.

“Aww come on Lex, that’s no way to greet your brother.” Xander smiled mischievously. Any normal person would’ve been glad to see their twin brother after so long, but this was Alex, and this was Xander. They were both far from normal, and so were the circumstances. She hadn’t seen him in just as long as she’d seen Damian, what did he want now?

“It is when I haven’t seen my “brother” in almost 120 years!” she yelled angrily. Alaska jumped off the bed and trotted to her side. She was sick of her past popping up and ruining the peace that she’s managed to gain, the sanity, and humanity she’d gain during their absence.

“Calm down sis. And the air quotes around ‘brother’ hurts my feelings Lex. I’m your twin, I come in peace.” He stated calmly with a smile. Xander’s smile always was comforting. This wasn’t the case this time.

Xander was taller that Alex standing at 6’2” with a build like a basketball player, lean but muscular. His skin was the same milk chocolate brown color as Alex’s. His hair was cut into a low fade. She took in the whole look of Xander. He like Damian hadn’t changed since the last time she saw him.

“So you came and found me with him huh?” Alex asked with her arms crossed.

“What are you talkin’ ‘bout Lex? With who?” Xander asked. This time the smile was gone and was replaced with a look of genuine confusion. She didn’t buy it.

“Don’t give me that lost puppy look!”Now she was angry. “You know who I’m talking about!” she yelled.

“No I don’t! Who are you talking about?”Xander asked looking concerned.

“Damian!” she finally brought herself to say his name out loud. She figured if she didn’t say it out loud, then the scene between them never happened. He never came and turned her world upside down. Alex fell to her knees when the realization of everything that was happening caught up with her. Reality sucks. She thought to herself. In one swift motion Xander was holding her as she kneeled on the floor trembling.

“Wait, Lex, Damian’s here? Where?” He really sounded afraid now. He sounded like such the big brother, even though he was only five minutes older. She looked up at her twin. This was a different Xander than the one she left in Paris over 120 years ago. That Xander was something that she didn’t want to associate herself with.

“You mean you really didn’t know he was here?” she asked as she looked at him in the eyes.

“No. I didn’t. I haven’t seen or spoken to Damian in an entire century. I didn’t like who he became after you left. He became enraged and obsessed finding you.” He explained.

“How did you find me?” she now shifted so she was facing him. They both sat on the floor like kindergarteners looking at each other eye to eye. Just then Xander smiled.

“You’re my twin sister Lex. No matter where you go, I’m always going to find you, even when you don’t want me to.” Xander’s eyes softened and he kissed his sister’s forehead. She missed her brother dearly, and never stopped thinking about him, but she didn’t like his timing. Then again another side of her thought his timing was just right, as always.

“What took you so long to find me?” Alex asked. She was almost hurt that it took him 120 years.

“You didn’t want to be found. I picked that much up from you. You gave this illusion that you were running from anything from your past, so I listened.” Xander explained.

“So what made you want to come now?”

“Easy, you’d been having that dream again haven’t you?” Alex nodded. She hated that he could get into her head. “Well I noticed one day that it was worse than usual. Then earlier today I got a feeling that you needed me so here I am. I’ve never been too far away, just far enough away so you wouldn’t know, but close enough that I can be there at a moment’s notice.” Xander smiled and nudged her shoulder. They booth stood up and Alex hugged him.

“Thanks for coming. I really needed you.”

“No problem. You’re the only family I’ve got. Now where do you keep the blood in this place?” he asked casually. Alex looked at him confused.

“You don’t hunt anymore? Don’t tell me you’ve went vegetarian.”

“Nope, no veggies form me.” He laughed. “After you left I thought about the way things were and I stick to getting my supply from blood banks.”

“Well my brother, you’ve come to the right place. Follow me.” Alex led Xander downstairs to the kitchen while Alaska followed. She opened the refrigerator and looked at Xander. His eyes were wide with amazement.

“Now I’ve got everything from O+ to AB-. Take your pick.” Alex offered.

“I’ll take some O+ please.” Xander requested politely with a smile. “How did you get all this blood?” Now he was curious. Alex knew she couldn’t ignore him now.

“Easy, if you volunteer at the blood bank and have vampire mind control powers.” She smiled and laughed. That poor lab tech never knew what hit him. While he was dazzled by Alex’s smile and beauty she continues to stock up as he helps load it all into her car week after week. It was a pretty sweet arrangement if she didn’t say so herself, he never would remember it, and she got away with it.

“Wow I’m impressed Lex.” Xander said. Then his face turned serious. Alex took the pouches and placed them into the microwave pressed START and walked away to get them both their own crazy straw.

“Crazy straws, cute.” Xander laughed. The timer went off and she placed his pouch in front of him. She sat down and started to drink, and that same effect of her body recharging took place. She didn’t notice how all this stress was draining her until the blood hit her tongue and bounced all its sweetness around her mouth. Xander looked up at her and took a sip. He looked serious now.

“So Damian saw you today?” Alex nodded looking up from her pouch. “When? Where were you? Was he here? Does he know where you live?” She really didn’t want to answer his questions right now, but he looked serious.

“He was at my school. I thought I was being watched when I got out of my car, but I shrugged it off. I guess he was waiting for me. I’m not sure if he knows where I live since he was at my school, because I didn’t feel weird until I got there.” Alex explained. She looked deep into her twin brother’s eyes. She was looking to see if he really didn’t know about Damian. She looked harder. She didn’t find deceit, she found sincerity, and genuine concern, and then she found it. She saw a glimmer of pure terror in his eyes. He quickly tried to cover it up but it was there, she’d seen it, although brief it was there. He really didn’t know about Damian, and he was scared, like she was, about what he was capable of and what he was planning. Xander looked deep into Alex’s eyes and saw the same thing that she’d seen in his. Xander’s face hardened and became very serious.

“Lex I want you to tell me everything that you know, and I want you to tell me right now.” Alex finished her sip and started to explain to Xander everything she knew, although it wasn’t much she knew every bit helped. And at this point Damian had the upper hand, and that scared her. They needed a plan and the needed it quick before it was too late.

"The Past is Never the Past"-Part of the "Timeless" short story series

2009-11-15T21:58:00.000-05:00

Alex stood in fear as she looked at the figure that now stood in front of her. How did he find her? How did he manage to sneak up behind her? Why was she giving him so much power over her? She’d made this same mistake not too long ago and she wasn’t going to make it again. The tension between the two of them grew stronger as they stared into each other’s eyes. His crimson eyes bore into her as if he was searching for something within her very soul. Move, do something! Say something! Her mind was screaming at her to do something. She willed herself to move, but failed. She hated this. She felt helpless, scared even. Why? She was what he was. He smiled and his fangs shone and glistened in the dark of the room. Something within her snapped. Everything boiled over and with a low growl she slammed him onto the wall and had him by the throat before he could bat an eyelash. She finally got the initiative to speak.

“Why are you here Damian?” She hissed angrily. He looked into her eyes and laughed.

“Well, look at you, fangs showin’ and all. Someone’s happy to see me.” Damian chuckled. Alex tightened her grip on Damian’s throat. She hated the fact that he dodged her question.

“Answer my question, or I will kill you!” She demanded. Damian’s smiled left his face and not that stood there was a condescending smirk.

“You’re not going to kill me. Now put me down or I won’t tell you while I’m here.” He baited. Alex loosened her grip she had on his throat and hesitantly put him down. Alex carefully stepped back and crossed her arms. She started tapping her foot rapidly as she leaned against the wall.

“Now, I let you down tell me why you’re here Damian.” This time she wasn’t scared, she was sick of his games. She always had been. With a whoosh Damian was in front of her. He grabbed Alex’s arm and put it over her head and pinned it to the wall. He gave a sly wink and smiled.

“Why do I have to have a reason to be here? Can’t a guy stop by and say hello to an old flame?” he asked as he spoke into the bend of Alex’s neck. His cool breath on her neck made her shiver slightly. Damian always knew how to get to her. She reluctantly looked into his now hazel eyes. As Alex took in all of Damian’s beauty her eyes went from his eyes to his boyishly cute face, down his 6’5”chocolate brown body. He looks good. Better than the last time I saw him. She thought to herself. YOU MUST NOT FORGET WHAT HE IS AND WHAT HE HAS DONE TO YOU AND OTHERS! The voice in her head screamed. With this thought reawakening her senses she pushed Damian off of her and out of her space.

“To answer your question, no you can’t come and see me, just because you feel like it!” Alex said in a raised whisper. “It’s been 120 years since I’ve last seen you so why are you here? It can’t be anything good.” Alex said with a little more bite and confidence. Damian looked at her and could tell that playtime was over. Then a thought came across his face and he smiled.

“Why I am here isn’t the most important question. The important question is, how did I find you after 120 years Alexandria? Or should I say Alex? I must say, if I can be honest, that name never could fit the beauty that truly exists within you.” Damian said as he paced back and forth. Alex was tired of his games. She walked over to him and stood in front of him.

“How did you find me Damian?” she asked annoyed.

“That’s the question! There we go “Alexandria, now you’re playing the game now!” Damian answered evilly as he circled Alex.

“I don’t have time for games.”

“Aww you’re no fun! Fine I’ll tell you. You used to be very creative Alexandria. Tsk tsk tsk you had me at bay for a while but then you got sloppy.”

“My name is Alex now. Alexandria is the past that I wish to keep there-in the past” Alex responded. Her body stiffened as Damian still circled her then stopped.

“Never!” he yelled angrily. “You will always be Alexandria to me and that’s never going to change. You can’t change your name and expect that all your sins are forgotten.” Damian laughed an evil laugh and looked at her again. “Actually it was your quest for retribution that led me to you. Did you really think you could out run me? Now you know me better than that. I’ve learned a lot about you in my time I spent chasing you. You’ve always wanted to be a writer I took that in combination with you middle name and compiled a list. I tracked down every single name and then I found you. Satisfied?” Damian was always a villain, but so had Alex. She shuddered at the thought of her past and spoke.

“So you found me now what? I don’t love you anymore. I’m a new person now. I’ve out grown you.” Alex answered with a false sense of confidence.

“Listen to you. “New person”, you haven’t been a person for a long time my love. And you can’t outgrow eternity. Still fighting who you are? Accept it. You did before and you were much happier.” Damian tilted his head as he looked into Alex’s eyes. He could sense that the vampire he loved was in there somewhere. Then with a whoosh had Alex pinned to the wall. She tried to squirm out but Damian was on top of her.

“Why I’m here will be revealed soon enough my love.” Damian’s eyes then traveled the course of Alex’s body. She didn’t like this at all. “You cannot escape who you are Alexandria. None of us can, and neither will this place. I will return to continue this conversation, so watch your back dear.” Damian warned. He then kissed Alex’s lips, and then her neck. Alex breathed deeply, and when she opened her eyes he was gone. Great, just great; Damian was back and she didn’t know why. “You cannot escape who you are” echoed in her head. What did he mean by that? What is his true purpose of being here? Alex glanced down at her watch and groaned. She so could not concentrate on school with Damian running around. She grabbed her keys out of her purse and headed back towards the parking lot. She climbed into her car and sped off. She had to find out what Damian was up to and quick, before something horribly bad happened, and she just couldn’t let that happen.

"Forever Is Too Long"-1st Installment in the "Timeless" short story series

2009-11-14T20:15:00.000-05:00

The air was cool and crisp; it was filled with the scent of night and freshly fallen snow. It was December 23rd, 1632. There in the middle of a field in London, England stood a girl, no younger than 21. Her hair was long and jet black, her skin was brown as the tree bark around her. The full moon gleamed onto the snow creating a dreamy scene. The wind blew her hair as she turned quickly. She was out of breath and panting, trying to bring some air into her already burning lungs. Something was chasing her, something terrible and unseen. She heard a twig break in the quiet of her surroundings. She turned and looked into the deep darkness of the forest that surrounded her. She saw nothing. What was this? Where had she run to? She was far from her home and her family; far from the warmth of her fireplace and her safe and familiar surroundings. Another twig broke, and she looked into the night once more to see crimson red eyes staring back at her in the darkness. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up. She wanted to let out a scream but nothing came. She stood there, frozen in total and complete fear. Before she could blink the creature was on top of her and sunk its teeth deep into her neck. Her blood flowed from her neck, tainting the purity of the freshly fallen snow. She didn’t resist. She gave up fighting and laid there limp as she slipped into unconsciousness and the field around her grew darker and darker as she fell into the darkness. She kept falling, unsure if she’d ever get up again.

It was an early fall morning just outside New York City when Alexandria woke up in a cold sweat. She’s had that same dream over a hundred times and it still scared the crap out of her. She reached for her neck and rubbed over where she was bitten. “You’d think after all this time you’d be used to it.” She mumbled aloud to herself. She climbed out of bed and looked in the mirror. She looked for the bite marks that were there once there. The markings left behind by the vampire that attacked her so many years ago on that fateful night. As she rubbed her neck she wanted to cry. She never saw the face of the creature that attacked her and took her from the life that she had once known. She lost everything; her family, her friends, her home, and sometimes she felt as if her humanity was slipping away from her along with her sanity.

Alexandria was in a whole different world now. She lived in a world where vampires didn’t exist outside of books, TV shoes, and movies. Her kind was reduced to being nothing but fictional creatures. If only the humans knew just how fictional they were. Back in her century vampires were very much known and taken care of accordingly. She shook the thought of the past and looked in the mirror. She looked like she’d been dragged through hell and slapped in the face. “Ugh. If I keep having this dream I’m going to be the only vampire to look as if they aged.” She said to herself as she brushed her hair. She made her way back to her bed and glanced at the clock on her bedside table. The time blinked 4:35am on the LCD display. She shrugged and then threw herself onto her pillow and let out a groan. She hated her sleep being interrupted by stupid dreams recollecting the past. She rolled over and pulled the covers over her head as she heard nails tapping on the hardwood floor. Alex’s body stiffened as the tapping grew closer. Her door creaked open and the tapping was now in her room. She felt her bed shift due to additional weight on one side. She felt a tugging on her blanket and then it was thrown from her body.

“Very funny Alaska!” she giggled as she took her pillow and hit the Siberian husky in the face with it. If she loved anything in this world it was Alaska. Alaska was Alex’s dog. He was a purebred Siberian husky. His fur was black on top and white on the bottom, which perfectly contrasted his piercing sky blue eyes. “Guess it’s time for me to get up, huh boy?” she asked. Alaska answered with a slight nudge with his wet nose on her forehead. Alex groaned and Alaska answered with a barrage of dog kisses all over her face. “Eww! I’m up! I’m up! Now stop!” she commanded with a smile. Alaska jumped off the bed and headed out of the room. Alex then turned on her iPod and headed to the shower. Her day started now whether she liked it or not.

Alex went through her normal routine grabbed her car keys and her back pack and headed down the stairs into the kitchen. She never understood why she had this big house in the middle of nowhere and it was just her and Alaska. Then she remembered that it was safer for her to be here than in the city. Here there was no temptation to be the monster that she was forcefully turned into. The mailman left her mail in the mailbox up the road so there was only human contact when she was at school or out in the city. Here she was free to be herself and didn’t have to hide it. If she wanted to sleep in a tree she could sleep in a tree without questions being asked. Not that she would but if she wanted to she could.

She opened the refrigerator and grabbed a pouch of AB+ and made her way to the microwave. She’d been doing this for so long that she knew how long that it took get it exactly at 98.6. She punched 3:33 onto the display, placed the pouch in the microwave, pressed START and walked away to feed Alaska. When the timer dinged she went to her silverware drawer and grabbed a crazy straw. Yes, a crazy straw. She thought it made it less morbid that she was drinking blood if it was through a crazy straw. She grabbed the pouch and poked a hole in it with the straw and began to drink. Alex found it very odd to even herself that she treated a pouch of human blood like a Capri-Sun, but she shrugged the thought off and continued to drink. Donated blood wasn’t as good as fresh, but it did the trick. The warm sweet liquid slid down her throat and recharged her body like coffee does for humans. It warmed her insides like hot chocolate with a hint of latex. Alex learned to ignore that taste and figured a little latex is better than becoming a monster and preying on those that didn’t deserve to die at her hand because she was hungry. That just wasn’t in her personality. She sucked the last drop left and grabbed her keys. Alaska escorted Alex to the door. She petted his head and gave him a quick hug and head out the door towards her red 2010 Audi R8. She liked to keep to herself that doesn’t mean she had to be a hermit and drive a Taurus. She had the money and dammit she was gonna spend it. She got in, hooked up her iPod and embarked on the 45 minute trip to NYU where she majored in Music and Creative Writing and minored in Recorded Music.

Alex drove down the road and saw the familiar scenery that she passed on a daily basis. She looked out the window from time to time to see her surroundings morph from the woods where she lived, to the suburbs, to the city. It all seemed to morph gradually into one fluid motion as me she made her way to school. She took this way every day, but the beauty and serenity still amazed her to this day. It was peaceful and familiar. It was like peace morphing into the chaos that lingered within the city. Although chaotic, she loved the city; there was something about it that drew her to it like a moth to a flame. The pull of the allure was unimaginably strong and she had no idea why.

She finally made it onto campus and parked her car. When she got out it was still dark as she made her way to the Student Union. This is why she left so early. That way the sun wouldn’t bother her as she made her way to school. She never had to worry about the transition between classes because she was only exposed for no more than five minutes. She’d feel a little sick, as if she had heat stroke, than burst into flames. As she entered the building to go wait for the start of her first class she felt as if someone had been watching her. She turned to see that no one was there. Alex shrugged the feeling off. What was wrong with me? There usually wasn’t anyone here this early, so why was today any different? She asked herself in her head.

Alex shook her head to shake this creepy feeling that she had and started to walk down the long dark hallway. It smelled just like any college hallway. It smelled of paper, textbooks, fresh coffee and pen ink. Her highly sensitive sense of smell allowed her to have a different view of what school was, but she wasn’t going to dig. She didn’t want to taint this pure scent of innocence and higher learning. Just as she allowed herself to be swept away by the scent of the hallway she heard a whoosh behind her. She turned around again to see that there was nothing there. “Get it together Alex!” She whispered to herself. She kept walking until she reached the indoor bridge way between the two buildings. It was usually used by horny college students that wanted to get a little something before class. It was windowless and secluded and that gave her a bad feeling. Alex kept walking down the long hallway and then heard the automatic door open behind her. Alex didn’t bother turning this time; she figured that it was nothing just like the rest even though her gut told her something else. Suddenly the hallway went cold. She heard footsteps and they were coming up right behind her. They were just light enough that humans would’ve never heard them. She froze, scared of who was behind her. She could take whoever it was, but she didn’t like her time to herself interrupted. The footsteps were getting closer, the room got colder. In what seemed like no time at all she felt a cold breath on the back of her neck. The scent of the breath was familiar to her but the cold froze her and she couldn’t move. “Hello Alexandria.” a deep male voice hinted with a British accent, whispered into her ear from behind her. Who was this that called her by a name that she left behind so long ago? She turned around and gasped as she saw the face of the voice that had spoken to her. Now she was truly terrified.

Creativity Corner-One More thing On My Plate

2009-11-14T20:04:00.000-05:00

As you know I'm a very creative person. I do Graphic Design, I draw and I'm currently working on a book. Well I got stuck on my book and really don't want to force any ideas out that would bring down the quality of the story. So with the push and bullying by my BFF and fellow blogger/writer/graphic designer Sabrina (@thinkin_ONPAPER) AKA Optimus Prime, BKA My Twin, I decided to start my own short story series named "Timeless." I figure taking a step back from the book will allow me to come up with some more fresh and original ideas. The first installment is called "Forever Is Too Long" will be posted shortly(after this post actually). I hope you guys like it. I will also post a list of songs that each installment was inspired by in hopes that you can get the feel of the story and can fully immerse yourselves in it to enhance your enjoyment. If you like it please feel free to comment here or on twitter. Thanks.

~*~Evol_1~*~

YUUUP!-My 1st Trey Day!!

2009-10-16T18:57:00.000-04:00

BET knows how to put together one hell of a show!!Keeping that in mind let me start from the beginning.

The day: Thursday October 15^th, 2009. The place: House of Blues Cleveland. The reason: BET Live Presents: The 106 n Park Tour. The goal: To see Trey Songz!! All of this was enough to make a girl restless! I couldn’t sleep the night before so I decided to do my hair and make my t-shirt for the show. After finishing that I went to sleep at 8am! I woke up at 1:45pm. It was showtime!!

It was cold and raining outside, but I knew this already because I diligently watched the weather for Thursday for a week. Just so I could be prepared for the journey that was upon me. I figured I’d stop at Subway and a corner store for a foot long sub and a pop on my way to the rapid station (Cleveland’s subway type thing). I figured I was going to be standing outside for a while so I decided that I needed something to eat and drink. Don’t ask why, I just like to b prepared. I was on a schedule; leave the house at 2:30 and catch the rapid at 2:57 and arrive downtown at 3:14. That was the plan and I was sticking to it. Being who I am I HAD to tweet my TTU/Twitter family about how I was leaving and not going to be on for a while. After I sent Trey a direct message welcoming him to my city (finally), I left my house at around 2:40. I thought to myself that I could still make my schedule. No! I missed the rapid because I went to Subway and had to stand behind the lady that didn’t know what she wanted. I wasn’t worried though. I planned for this, it’s just people make me angry. You don’t ever fit time for other people’s ignorance into your schedule. I head to the rapid station, IPod blaring nothing but Trey Songz to get me hyped up for my long wait ahead.

I arrived at the House of Blues at 3:40. I didn’t see anyone standing outside. So I walked around the block to make sure I was going to be standing in the right place, so I wouldn’t find out later I was in the wrong spot ad end up waaaayy in the back. On my walk around the block I passed the parking lot to the HOB, and that’s where I saw it. The reason I was there in the first place. The big orange tour bus…Trey Songz’ tour bus! After standing there in awe and snapping a quick picture, I noticed that the lights in the bus were on. Was he in there? Did he see me? Does he think I’m crazy for taking a picture of his tour bus? After my quick groupie moment I walked back to HOB. Just to make sure I would be standing in the right spot I decided to ask the guy who was out there putting the letters up on the marquee. He told me where to stand and I took my post.

There I stood for about 20 minutes. In that time I saw I saw a van full of back up dancers, Sean Garret’s assistant she asked me if I knew where a Louis Vuitton store was(I put 2 and 2 together when the Louis bags came out during the show). I even saw someone’s from Trey’s crew. There I stood, listening to music and anxious waiting for the time to past, while waiting under the sign awning to keep me dry from the rain. I found some people to hang out with in line. We were the first ones there and we were on a mission. I already gained their respect; we even talked about forming a chain in front of the doors so we could get up front. All that was shattered when I saw a little piece of paper saying that if you pay $15 they’ll let you wait in the restaurant and wait AND get in the music hall first!! What type of fuckery is that? We were pissed all of us didn’t have 15 extra damn dollars, tickets alone were $40!! I brushed it off and braved the cold and rain, “It’s all for Trey.” I told myself. That was my mantra. We all were anxiously waiting in the rain for 7:00 to come around. While I waited I mingled. It’s something about my personality that draws people to me. I don’t know what it is. I ate my sandwich and kept my pop full in case I needed to get gutta on some bishes!!lol. I kept it at the ready.

They didn’t let us in until 7:30-ish. Just like black folks! lol. They told us to form into three lines and that we had to take everything out of our pockets. They wanded us with those security wands and checked our purses. My hands were so frozen I had to ask the guard to open my purse for me. I walked into the music hall and I couldn’t believe I was finally there. When I walked in it was ok so far so good I thought. Then I saw it!!The crowd full of people that had that damn $15!!!Ugh. I found the people I was with outside and stood with them. It was packed and I mean packed. Everyone had something on someone. I chanted to myself that it was all for Trey and stood my ground. While we waited and listened to the really odd choice of wait music. People were trying to squeeze themselves past people to head towards the bar. Like come on I know you see there’s no room!!Finally after about 15-20 minutes of waiting Terrance J and Rocsi pop up on the screen. They introduce Sean Garret and he comes out and comes out hard! I wasn’t a fan of Sean Garret before the show but the man knows how to put on a show!!He had me screaming for him. Wtf? He threw out 2 Louis bags and came in the audience. When he came in everyone moved up and squished people to get close to him. I was thinking to myself yall go ahead and try to get closer, I’m just gonna take your spot to get closer to the front spot that was rightfully mine!! I may be goofy but I’m smart dammit!!lol.

After he did his set next it was Day 26. I again found myself in a different place that I was before. I didn’t care because I was closer to the stage. We waited for Day 26 and they opened with “Bi-Polar”. Love the song by the way!! Them boys did the damn thing!! Willie was lookin all good and when he took his shirt off I went crazy. Then another opportunity presented itself. Brian jumped into the crowd. He was like 20 people beside me! He was so close yet so far away! Anyway while the girls went to mob him on one end and Que on the other, I moved up. I wasn’t here solely for them; I was here mostly for Trey. When they were done I was beyond cramped. I’m so glad I wasn’t claustrophobic, but I hated that I was short.

Now it was Mario’s turn. Screen Terrance and screen Rocsi introduced Mario. I love Mario I really do and I was happy to see that he grew his hair back. He came out with his back up dancers and boy was he looking good. He had the whole crowd swag surfin. I hated swag n surf but I was doin the damn thing.lol. I tried my best to see throughout the whole show because some tallish tree girl stood in front of me so I could only see him if he was in the middle, all the while there was some girl crying hysterically because Mario was on stage. I mean hysterically, like someone died or something. She was about to pass out and kept screaming “I love you Mario”. He sang “Just a Friend”, “Braid My Hair”, “Let Me Love You”, “How Could You”, and some songs off of DNA. Break Up was cool. For “Braid My hair” he pulled a girl up on stage and sang to her. Being the Mario lover I am, I was hatin and hatin hard. Sean Garret came back out and did his part. And when Mario tried to sing his part he looked at him and said “If you stick to your part, I’ll stick to mine.” They finished out the set and my heart started to race. While we waited for Trey some of his promo people came out and started chaos by throwing posters. I wasn’t really pressed about the posters since I was just grateful to be there. Then they threw the cardboard cut out. I swear to you this thing was crowd surfing. Lol. It reached where I was and I held on to both sides for dear life. After realizing I had nowhere to put this big ol’ thing I let go. So the girl next to me got it. After she calmed down she looked and realized it was missing its head. Trey was headless! I later found out who had Trey’s head when he came on and I saw her waving it in the air! lmao.

Finally, it was Trey’s time now. People were leaving and I was moving up! I was in the dead center of the floor. No tall people in front of me. One of the girls I semi kind of knew was next to me and she was tall so she was like my support. The conditions were perfect. As we waited the tension within me built up. Then with one word it would all come to its peak. We chanted “Trey! Trey! Trey! Trey!”, then we heard it! “YUUUP!” I lost it! I was hysterical!! I was screaming like I was well, seeing Trey Songz for the first time! I was so full of joy and excitement, I started to cry. Not hysterical crying, just “Oh my god I can’t believe I’m about to see Trey” cry. The music plays. “U Belong to Me”, and for the next hour I was. I was all Trey’s and he was mine (in my head). The curtain opens and there he stood. As soon as he looked out into the crowd I almost died! This was what I was waiting for! I was screaming louder than anybody else. That’s when it happened. I don’t remember what song it was but when Trey first reached the middle, I guess he noticed me in a sea full of people and looked me dead in my eyes and smiled. I screamed and wanted to faint. I don’t know if he thought I was a super fan or recognized me from Twitter, but he looked at me and only me. I thought I was going crazy. Trey did his thing. Black Roses came on and I lost my mind because that’s my song. I sang and YUUUP!’d like I never have before in my life. He sang “Gotta Make It” ad he looked at me again!! Actually throughout his whole set he would glance at me when he reached the middle of the stage. It wasn’t anything sexual; it was like “I know you’re a fan and I see you” type of look. Then some groupie type stuff happened. I knew it was going to happen but not by me! This girl threw her panties on stage when “Panty Droppa” came on! She actually took off her panties that she was wearing and threw them on stage. Then had the heffaskank yelled “I threw my panties at you Trey”. I laughed at the desperateness of her actions and went on about the show. When he did “Say Ahh” I was looking out for Yonny, my hometown hero. He didn’t come on stage, but I did see him. He came out when everybody was doin their thing and just wildin out. Samiyyah ad Najja did their thing. Najja was looking sexier than ever with his big ol’ dimple. Lol. Then Lol J came on and I was so happy. Yonny was on stage and looked a little stiff! Not the same Yonny we’ve seen on Ustream goin ham with his dance and his go ham shades!!I screamed for Yonny and went on about my merry time. Trey did a few more songs and then it happened. “Yo Side” started to play. I knew this was the end but I didn’t care. This man entertained me for the night and it was finally coming to a close. As soon as he said “Every time she leaves it’s my heart that she’s taking from me” I burst into tears. I tried to record it but my arm was getting tired. The tall girl next to me offered to record it for me. After the guitar solo my phone died. Which was ok since I loved that part anyway. When Trey was done he did his bows and walked off stage. Everyone thought he was done, but I knew he wasn’t. We all shouted for Trey and he came back out. He ran out shirtless!! Now my night was complete! He ran out and thanked everyone and bowed and blew kisses. He knew he put on a show and we loved I, and he wanted to show he loved us back. True Trey fashion. He got down on his knees and thanked us. I cried slightly knowing that I was here with him (sorta) on this journey from day 1 and here he was. Both of us rewarded for our hard work for each other. He looked at me, like he did throughout his set, and blew a kiss my way. If you weren’t paying attention you wouldn’t have caught it, but I did. Trey seemed as if he didn’t wanna leave, but he had to go right now. Lol. His set was finally over and he left the stage. I had to stand there for 10 minutes after the show just to collect myself and to make sure that this really just happened. I walked out of the House of Blues on Cloud YUUUP! Lol. I was so high off of the night that I forgot that my feet hurt. I walked to the rapid station playing “LOL J”,a perfect ending to a perfect night. I met up with 1 of the girls I stood in line with and we rode home together.

This overall experience for me was great. I had fun, my spot wasn’t too bad, and of course Trey!! I did learn that if I ever go back to the HOB I’m bringing an extra $15 just in case. Lol. But I got tons of pictures and videos that I’m going to post to Twitter soon. I personally want to thank Jasmine (@Lady3077). If it wasn’t for her and her genuine love for a fellow TTU sister, I wouldn’t have been able o have one of the best nights of my life. I had enough fun for all of TTU and I must have repped good enough to get Trey to look at me like he did! Well there’s my story I hope you enjoyed it, and I’m sorry it’s so long, but I wanted to paint a picture for those that weren’t as fortunate as me to experience the show.

Creativity Corner-Vivie the Beat Maker?

2009-10-03T20:11:00.000-04:00

I know what you're thinking."She writes.She sings.She draws and does computer graphics.And now she produces?"Well actually I do.Over the past 24 hours I've been through a lot of crap. I didn't quite know how to express it all. Then it hit me.Let it out through music.So I decided to dip my feet back into the producing pool again.I say again because I've secretly produced 2 tracks before my most current one. Here I have posted all three of my self produced tracks using stock sounds from the free trial version of Acoustica Mixcraft 4.I love this program, and if I could buy the whole thing I would, but that's why I want a MacBook more than ever because it has producing software pre-installed.These three tracks are all different.There's one that's a punk rock track,one that's a rock power ballad,and another is a slow r&b track.Hope you like them as much as I do.
~*~Evol_1~*~

So Over It

Bittersweet Love Affair

Ode to a Faithless Lover

Wow Long Time, No Blog

2009-10-03T19:03:00.000-04:00

Wow I haven't blogged in quite a long while.I've just been so busy with school,writing my book,Photoshopping, and living my life.I never mean to abandon you guys as readers(although there isn't so much to abandon*wink*)But I promise I'll try to fit blogging back into my life as soon as possible.
~*~Evol_1~*~

Real Evol Talk-Someone Call the Doctor Cuz Eminem Has Killed Another 1!

2009-08-01T21:54:00.000-04:00

I was chatting with some friends on Tiny Chat one night, and the subject of Mariah Carey’s new hit “Obsessed” came up. Then my friend Jemi(@itsJemi) brought up the subject of an Eminem diss track, addressing Mariah and Nick Cannon. I thought she was talking about Em’s track “Bagpipes from Baghdad”, but she was talking about a whole new song! After hearing that he ripped them both to shreds I just HAD to hear it. So I went to the place where anyone can find anything, the internet, and found it on YouTube.

I pressed play and was reeled in at the 1st spit of a lyric. DAMN! He did it again. Eminem has made his return. No more Marshall that was Eminem, dirty, nasty, vulgar, and a lyrical monster, everything that he was in his heyday. I knew when Mariah came up with the song “Obsessed” Eminem was going to say something, then when the video came out, smh I KNEW there was going to be a response. And the response is RIDICULOUS!! The song is called “The Warning”. Wow the title alone lets you in on what’s next to come. Eminem airs out some very dirty laundry about the Mariah, and I mean dirty.

I just have one thing to ask Mariah? Why would you go after Eminem?He the crowned undisputed “King of the diss track”. Mariah are you brainless? I think Nick is pumping up your ego to make you think that you could go up against the likes of Slim Shady. What made you think that he wasn’t going to respond, or maybe that’s what you wanted? Hmm. Interesting.

This track is pure fire with a gas station explosion. I posted the lyrics and the video below. If you like Mariah and don’t want your image of her to change, then I suggest you don’t listen to this song. So, I’m going to sit back with my friend and fellow blogger, Brina (@thinkin_ONPAPER) with our popcorn, her Jolly Ranchers Soda and my Pink Pixie (Sprite and pink lemonade) and enjoy the show that is soon to come. This is just the previews, wait until the main event. This is going to be good!
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Eminem- The Warning

Eminem-The Warning

Only reason I dissed you in the first place is because you denied seeing me,
Now Im pissed off.

Sit back homey relax, infact grab a six pack, kick back while I kick facts,
Yeah Dre sick track, perfect way to get back
Wanna hear something wick wack?
I got the same exact tat thats on Nicks back
Im obsessed now,
Oh gee, is that supposed to be me in the video with the goatee,
Wow Mariah, didnt expect her to go balls out,
Bitch, shut the fuck up before I put all them phone calls out, you made to my house when you was wild n out before Nick,
When you was on my dick and give you somethin to smile about,
How many times you fly to my house? Still trying to count,
Better shut your lying mouth if you dont want Nick finding out,
You probably think cuz its been so long if i had something on you I woulda did it by now,
Oh on the contrary, Mary Poppins, Im mixing our studio session down and sending it to mastering to make it loud,
Enough dirt on you to murder you,
This is what the fuck I do,
Mariah, it ever occur to you that I still have pictures?
However you prefer to do and goes for Nick too, faggot
You think Im scared of you?
You gonna ruin my career you better get one,
Like Ima sit and fight with you over some slut bitch cunt that made me put up with her psycho ass over 6 months and only spread her legs to let me hit once,
Yeah, what you gonna say? Im lucky? Tell the public that I was so ugly that you fucking had to be drunk to fuck me?
Second base? What the fuck you tell Nick, pumpkin?
In the second week we was dry humping. Its gotta count for something,
Listen, girly. Surely you dont want me to talk about how I nutted early 'cos ejaculated prematurely and bust all over your belly, and you almost started hurling and said I was gross, go get a towel youre stomachs curling.
Or maybe you do.
But if Im embarrassing me, Im embarrassing you and dont you dare say it isnt true.
As long as the songs getting airplay Im dissing you.
Im a hair away from getting carried away and getting sued.
I was gonna stop at 16. That was 32. This is 34 bars. We aint even third of the way through.
Damn, Slim. Mariah played you. Mariah who?
Oh did I say whore, Nick? I meant a liar too.
Like Ive been goin off on you all this time for no reason,
Girl you out ya alcholic mind. Check ya wine cellar. Look at all the amounts of all the wine,
Like I fuckin sit around and think about you all the time,
I just think this shit is funny when I pounce you on a rhyme.
But fuck it now im about to draw the line.
And for you to cross it thats a mountain that I doubt you wanna climb.
I can describe areas of your house you wouldnt find on an episode of Cribs,
A blow below the ribs if I hear another word so dont go opening your jibs cos every time you do its just another load of fibs,
I aint saying this shit again, ho, you know what it is.
Its a warning shot for I blow up ya whole spot,
Call my bluff and Ill release every fucking thing I got,
Including the voicemails right before you flipped your top,
When me and Luis were tryin to stick two CDs in the same spot,

(Slim Shady I love you)
I love you too
Let me whisper sweet nothings into your ear, boo. Now what you say?
(Its nothing)
Yeah so what Ill do?
Is refresh your memory when you said I want you
Now should I keep going or should we call truce?
(You think youre cute, right? Hahaha)
You bet your sweet ass I do
(Im Mary Poppins, b)
And Im Superman, ooo
(Mary P. Slim Shady)
Comin at you
So if youll still be my (babygirl)
Then Ill still be your (Superhero, Wilma M.)
Yeah, Im right here
(You like this)
Nope. Not anymore, Dear.
It cuts like a (knife) when I tell ya get a (life)
But Im movin on with mine
Nick, is that your (wife)
Well tell her to shut her mouth then Ill leave her alone,
If she dont (sing this script?) then Ima just keep goin.
(I see Mary Ann. Mary Anns saying cut the tape, cut the tape. Knife!)

The Things You Find On YouTube

2009-08-01T20:58:00.000-04:00

I was surfing the internet and landed on some very interesting videos on YouTube. I found versions of Trey's songs redone by Alvin and the Chipmunks.lol. These are so cute. I like these little remixes done by people to make it sounds like it's being sung by the furry little trio. They made me smile. So i hope they do the same for ya'll. Enjoy!

I Need a Girl(Chipmunks Remix)

In Ya Phone(Chipmunks Remix)

Missing You(Chipmunks Remix)

ROCK ON!Track of the Day!

2009-08-01T20:37:00.000-04:00

I usually don't post on the weekends.(Homework and relaxation needs to be done.)I just love this track so much that I had to put it on my blog. Maybe because I love the feeling of empowerment. Today's RO!TD is "He Aint With Me Now Tho" by Rich Girl. I like this video a lot as well. The outfits are insane!And the man candy isn't bad either!(YUMMY!!) Not just that but it's a good club track, and that's exactly what I needed. This track makes me feel like all eyes on me and I'm looking and feeling good while you stare. So sit back, relax and enjoy the song. Get your Troy Taylor head bob on and ROCK ON!
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Rich Girl-He Ain't With Me Now Tho

Gossip Grl Corner-Say it Aint So!!!

2009-07-30T19:10:00.000-04:00

Awww hell. Damn Mediatakeout.com.Why did you do this to me? I was cruising around the internet and smh I found my way onto Media Takeout. The story was from a very "reliable" source, that Kim Kardashian called up none other than USHER, and asked him on a date!!!I've never hoped Media Takeout's stories were just mindless, unverified garbage, so much since they said Trey was dating Drew Sidora. NO USHER NO!!!!!Don't do it!!!I mean Kim is a cute girl and all.(PAUSE) But she's not what you need. I love Usher. Seriously, the men I date have to meet the standards of Trey and Usher! Mmm Mmm Mmm. Anyway, I don't believe it. If she had to allegedly call him obviously he wasn't very interested. Let me stop, because I'm so mad that I can't even write about it.(That never happens.)So thank you MTO for ruining my day. I guess(and sincerely hope) that Usher and Kim Khardashian are MTO's couple of the week.What do you guys think?

Back in the Day Thursday!!!!

2009-07-30T18:26:00.000-04:00

This week I'm takin ya'll back, back to 2002. This week's "Back in the Day Thursday" is from Lil Flip's 2002 album "Undaground Legend", "This is the Way We Ball". This song take me back to the 8th grade. Back when everybody had "Burberry" or "GUCCI" something or another. When everyone was wearing Timberlands in May(I have no idea why.) This was a time where I was more concerned with boys and sports, and Twitter wasn't even on my radar. Well enjoy this trip down memory lane. I know I did.
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Lil' Flip-This is the Way We Ball

ROCK ON!Track of the Day!

2009-07-30T16:50:00.000-04:00

This RO!TD is off of Fabolous' new album "Loso's Way" that was released yesterday. This album has caused a lot of hype over the internet in the past 24 hours. I'm a fan of Loso and his many changing names and personas. I must admit that I am a big fan of his new sexy, grown man, swagger. Love it!I found "Last Time"on the "Swagga Like Songz Vol.2" mixtape. I heard it and liked it a lot. Enjoy it! F-A-B-O-L-O-U-S!!HAHA!!ROCK ON!
(Download the "Swagga Like Songz Vol.2" HERE) or (Downlaod Fabolous' album "Loso's Way" HERE)

Video Review Wednesday is Postponed

2009-07-30T15:31:00.000-04:00

SMH I REALLY wanted to review Loso's new video for his song "Everything, Everyday, Everywhere". I really like this video and I love the cameo made by my fav guy, Trey Songz. Well, I'm just going to have to post my review later this week. I can't find a video I can embed because Loso's label took them all down due to copyright reasons. Oh well, trust me, if you haven't seen it, it's worth the wait!
~*~EvoL_!~*~

TTU Tuesday!!

2009-07-28T18:13:00.000-04:00

Since I love my TTU family so much, I decided to give them their own day on my blog. So ladies and gentleman I give you,"TTU Tuesday"!!!!

This week's "TTU" Tuesday is dedicated to Gloria(@MusikHunny) and all my other TTU Treymates that Go Ham for Mr.Trigga Trey Songz! Why is Gloria so special? Well, she got Trey to follow her yesterday. How? Did she GO HAM like you did? She went ham, but not quite like I did. She went ham in a different way. Trey was at a radio station yesterday afternoon doing some promo for his very highly anticipated album "READY",(Due in stores on September 1st.For real this time!lol.Go pre-order it HERE)

Trey being who he is tweeted out the number to the radio station. That's when the Hamfest began. Everytime I called I got a busy signal, as did everyone else. I gave up, mostly because 1)my phone was dying and 2)minutes aren't free. But someone got through to talk to Trey!Who was it?Gloria of course!(Pay attention!)She got through and told him how ham TTU goes for him. She repped TTU when she could've been selfish and did something else. I logged off of Twitter for a moment, and when I came back, Gloria had a follow! So three cheers for Gloria! Hip hip Hoooraay!!Hip hip Hoooraay!!Hip hip Hoooraay!!

This is what TTU is all about. We're more than a class, we're a family. Some people have this notion that we're a nothing but a bunch of groupies. NO WE'RE NOT! We're NOT a cult, groupies, or overzealous fans. We're dedicated supporters. What I find very funny is that Trey even acknowledges us, and even stops by on occasion to talk to us. So haters, don't get mad! He knows who true TTU is and who isn't. How? Troy has a list and he checks it twice! lol.

My TTU family has helped me thorough a lot of things. I'm truely blessed for finding these people that are now a permanent fixture in my life. They always know how to make me smile and laugh until I can't feel my face and on the verge of peeing my pants.lol. I love this group of people with all of my heart. And eventhough we are in different parts of the country we're still closer than friends who live down the street from each other. I love my TTU family!!

ROCK ON! Track of the Day!

2009-07-28T17:24:00.000-04:00

Today’s RO!TD is brought to you by Vistoso Bosses featuring Soulja Boy “Delirious”. I listened to it and I fell in love with it, even Soulja Boy’s part. He can rap about things other than money and swag. Actually the only songs by Soulja Boy that I like are the one’s geared to girls. Anyway, this song is addictive and fun. It’s like candy on crack! lol. Check it out and you’ll see what I mean. It’s a pure, sweet, summer track and their fashion sense is so unique. This is a breath of fresh air for the female R & B game. I hope their career lasts longer than the summer. To find out more about Vistoso Bosses, check out their MySpace. Vistoso Bosses Myspace Page ROCK ON!
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Vistoso Bosses featuring Soulja Boy-"Delirious"

Trey Day Monday!!!!

2009-07-28T01:28:00.000-04:00

Yay!! Today is the 1st installment of Trey Day Monday!!! This track is one heck of a cherry popper. I haven't been able to take it off repeat since I heard it. I love it that much! This song is called "We Need to Roll"featuring Mario and Joe, and it's off of the "Swagga Like Songz Vol.2" mixtape, hosted bt my favorite djs, DJ Ill Will and Dj Rockstar. I love it and I hope you will too.
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Downlaod "Swagga Like Songz Vol.2" HERE

Gossip Grl Corner-Corny,Repetitive, Sell Out ,Rapper Say WHAT?

2009-07-28T00:56:00.000-04:00

So I was surfing around Mediatakeout.com (As I usually do, to stay "informed") and came across this little jewel of a story. Accoroding to a Mediatakout.com reader (READER not SOURCE) Soulja Boy Tell 'Em tells 'em on a black gay chat site. Hmmm.
<---This picture is the supposed proof that Soulja Boy is batting for the other team on the down low. SMH. The reader said that the picture on the right was taken months before Soulja's now "big" famous photo. These pictures do look exactly the same. I have pictures doing the LOL:), does that mean that no one else is doing it?NO. Don't get me wrong, I'm NOT a Soulja boy fan, but even I have to admit that this is ridiculous. This is purely coincidental. I know plenty of guys with a photo like this on MySpace. Come on! This is a way for guys to get female(or male) attention with the only things that most women care about before we meet a guy. This just gets all the initial thoughts out of the way. Now if he made the same face, well then maybe I would believe it, but that's covered up. Again I state that this story came from a reader. Not an inside source in Soulja's camp, a reader, a faithful reader no less. Wake up world! Come on! Readers just want their 30 seconds of fame, while the media scrambles around to see if this story is true. Well the reputable media outlets that is. This is the exact reason why I don't really read the crap on Media Takeout. There's no truth behind it, and they don't try to dig deeper to find it. SMH at another attempt by Media Takeout to ruin a young, successful person's career.SMH. Shame on ya'll.
~*~EvoL_1~*~*

Real EvoL Talk-It's Bad Boy Baby!

2009-07-27T23:21:00.000-04:00

Sean “Diddy” Combs is someone that people are now starting to joke about. Yes, it’s true that Diddy can’t keep a group together long enough for them to reach superstar status, but just listen and maybe after this post you’ll change your mind on how you feel about him.

When Diddy first stepped on to the scene when I was a little kid I was in awe of him. Here was this man that lived the life I wanted to live. Money, fame and Mase was pretty cute to me then too. “Who was this man in the B.I.G. videos, and wearing silver suits that looked like garbage bags?” I asked myself. This was a successful man who came from nothing to build an empire that some people can only dream of coming close to. This man was my hero, my idol. Sean “Diddy” Combs.

I knew from day one that I wanted to be just like “Diddy”. Our names even sounded alike. I actually remixed his hit track “Diddy” to “Vivie” to match my name. Bad Boy, I wanted to be a part of it. With acts like 112 and Mase, how could I go wrong? Diddy is the prime example of hard work and determination. You don’t believe me? Look at the facts. The man is on the Forbes’s list of the richest people in hip hop, almost EVERY year. You can’t tell me that you didn’t have a “Sean John” t-shirt, jacket, headband or anything. You can’t read this and honestly not have appreciated some of the artists that he did put out. You can’t sit here and think or say to yourself that you didn’t want to try “Unforgiveable” or “Unforgiveable Woman”. You can’t say you didn’t watch “Making the Band” 3 and 4!

These things alone make Diddy successful. He’s a mogul. To me he’s more than that, he’s my role model. Some of the things that he’s done go above and beyond the call of hip hop. He could have stayed a producer and CEO but he reached out further than that. So you may not like “Making His Band” but you did watch it, and that’s enough. He’s trying to give people an opportunity, but he’s not going to just hand it to him. This is what’s missing now-a-days. Everyone is so consumed with what they’re getting that no one is giving regular people the opportunity to do things besides be on crappy reality love shows. Diddy is the epitome of success and hard work. I want the honor of interning under him one day, and learning from the best. Actually it’s my dream. I’d be his assistant and run in the freezing rain for cheesecake with no problem, if he would just let me stand around him and learn his formula for success. So lay off of him and don’t knock his hustle, because one day ya’ll are going to see me in his place, taking over the world using his formula.
~*~EvoL_1~*~

ROCK ON!Track of the Day!

2009-07-27T22:14:00.000-04:00

I was watching the Music Choice hip-hop music channel today, and came across this song. I liked the beat and the lyrics. That’s when it came to me. This is going to be the ROCK ON! Track of the Day. Today’s RO!TD is “What Happened” by Donny Goines off of his debut album “Minute After Midnight”. I heard this song and thought it was new, mostly because they didn’t have any information on him on Music Choice. So I did some research. I’ve come to find out that Donny Goines has been around since 2006. So check him out on his MySpace at http://www.myspace.com/donnygoines, and don’t 4 get 2 ROCK ON!
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Donny Goines- What Happened?

Real EvoL Talk-NBA Divas Check Your Attitudes at the Door

2009-07-24T20:35:00.000-04:00

Me being from Cleveland, I was thoroughly embarrassed to hear that LeBron James and Nike wanted the video of “King” James being dunked on by a college basketball player at one of his basketball camps. Oh my goodness, are you serious? I never liked LeBron and I never will, and this incident has secured my feelings. It just proves everything I’ve said. The world is now starting to see the REAL LeBron. The diva. The crybaby. Don’t get me wrong LeBron has a good little bit of game on him, but his personality is just as ugly as his sneakers. I have no idea why Cleveland worships him. Seriously there’s a huge picture of him on the side of a building downtown. Ugh. So now that that’s been said let me speak my piece.

I was watching TMZ the other night and Harvey Levin mad a very valid point. He said if LeBron and Nike would have just released the tape, there wouldn’t be so much buzz about it. Funny thing is the tape isn’t of the best quality. You can’t tell who is who.But I did manage to find a video with slow motion and a better angle.HAHAHA!!(Watch it below) He got dunked on by a college kid. SO WHAT! Michael Jordan was crossed over by Allen Iverson. Kobe Bryant was beaten by Dwight Howard. (They didn’t win the series but that’s not the point.) Some of the greatest players in the game have been shown up once or twice by the underdogs. Get over it; it’s a way of life. Every time LeBron gets shown up or beaten he throws a temper tantrum and everyone thinks it is shocking and makes it headline news. I swear living in Cleveland; I’ve heard the handshake story and every analysis that the sports casters could come up with, for weeks. No lie.

Speaking of the now infamous handshake incident, let’s speak on that. After the final seconds of the Eastern Conference Finals, LeBron never shook the hands of Dwight Howard and the Orlando Magic team. To some people LeBron was hurt and they understood, to people with half a brain he was being a spoiled brat. So what he didn’t win. It wasn’t the first time the Cavaliers lost the conference finals. So what made this time different? His other teammates shook their hands and went on about their night. Why couldn’t he? This isn’t the only incident of LeBron’s poor behavior. Let us not forget after the Championship LeBron was photographed wearing a shirt that said “LBJ MVP”. You couldn’t let Kobe have his moment, huh LeBron? This wasn’t the last apprearence of the “I’m a d-bag” shirts. The next time he was photographed he was wearing a shirt that said “Check My Stats”. Ok LeBron we get it. You were league MVP, but Kobe was the Finals MVP. You know the MVP you STILL haven’t been?

So, what is my point of my semi-rant? My point is that someone close to LeBron or anyone needs to step up and tell him to stop being an a-hole! It’s not cute. LeBron is slowly but surely losing his fan base because he’s forgotten where he’s come from. He used to be a very humble guy, but now he’s gone straight Hollywood. Don’t forget who buys everything you endorse LeBron. I’ll give you a hint, it’s the same people that keep you signed to Nike so you could have a puppet.
~*~Evol_1~*~

LeBron James Gets Dunked On!!

ROCK ON!Track of the Day

2009-07-24T19:32:00.000-04:00

Twitter and the internet have been abuzz about today’s track. Today’s “ROCK ON!Track of the Day” is “Run This Town” off of Jay-Z’s highly anticipated return album “The Blueprint 3”. I really like Jay-Z and no matter how crazy he is, Kanye West is one fantastic lyricist. No matter what my TTU classmates think about her, I love Rihanna so this song for me has hit the hip-hop tri-fecta. I like this song. The beat goes hard and so do the lyrics. This is the OFFICAIL return of hip hop from the sad state it was in before. So enjoy it as much as I do. ROCK ON! HOVA IS BACK!!
~*~EvoL_!~*~

Gossip Grl Corner-St.Lucia Does a Body Good

2009-07-24T19:00:00.000-04:00

The first post for the “Gossip Grl Corner”! YAY! Today’s(well actually yesterday’s)post is about Hollywood’s resident hot mess, Amy Winehouse. Now don’t get me wrong I like Amy. Well I like her music. She’s a great singer. I guess what they say bout true artistry is true. We all know how Amy was. She was drinking, smoking, and doing crack like it was going out of style. Amy was close to death, and everyone could see it. She was dying in front of cameras and all we did was just watch.
For the past few months, Amy had disappeared to St. Lucia while she got a divorce from her other train wreck of a husband. Well that trip did Amy some good, because she looks amazing. Well, as amazing that Amy Winehouse can look. I’m proud of her for trying to get her life together. Now that she’s back is she going to be able to keep this up? Or will the flashing lights and stress of stardom push her to the edge again? I’m waiting to see, but I’m rooting for her to succeed. See her amazing transformation below.
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Back in the Day Thursday

2009-07-24T17:46:00.000-04:00

Again another late post, I’m sorry I’ll be on it better. Promise. Well anyway, the first post for “Back in the Day Thursday” is Bone Thugs-N- Harmony’s “Crossroads”. This video reminds me of my cousin who was killed when he was 14 when I was in 5th grade. We watched this video together and he would hold me close to him because this video scared me. It reminds me that even though those we love are gone they are not forgotten or not in our hearts. That’s why I choose the videos I choose, especially the back in the day tracks. Every song carries a memory and a feeling and I want my reader’s to remember that feeling and memory when they hear a song, just like I do. I’ll share my memories if you share yours. Enjoy this trip down memory lane, I know I did.
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Bone Thugs-N-Harmony-"Crossroads"

ROCK ON!Track of the Day(Thursday's)

2009-07-24T15:40:00.000-04:00

Thursday’s “ROCK ON! Track of the Day” is coming today because I didn’t post yesterday. Thursday’s track comes courtesy of OK GO. “Here it Goes Again” also known as “the Treadmill Song”. I love this song! I love the video even more. It made me have a lot of respects for a band to make up moves like this! This video made treadmills cool! Enjoy it! I know I did! ROCK ON!
~*~EvoL_1~*~

OK GO-Here It Goes Again

Real EvoL Talk-Jumpoffs Learn Your Place!

2009-07-22T23:10:00.000-04:00

So the other day some of my Autobots and I came across something that would throw us all in a tizzy, especially Rih (@RockinRihRih she’s a little off though to begin with. I love you Rih!) I decided to investigate what all the noise was about. A girl had posted some things on Twitter that were a bit questionable. She has officially been labeled as Trey Songz’s jump off. Now for those who don’t know what a jump off is, a jump off is a male or female that sleeps with someone. That’s it. They are used just for sex when the other party is in town. You might get dinner.
Back on subject now. Not only did she post a picture of Trey’s signature “YUUUP” written on the wall, but she posted the whole thing on Twitter! SMH. Her tweets are below:

My boo suprised me…didn’t know he was here!!!! Night night ;D 5:48 AM Jul 17th from UberTwitter

@ the diner with @songzyuuup 3:59 PM Jul 17th from UberTwitter

@songzyuuup ice cream and cake and cake. Icecreamncakedodaicecreamncake. Icecreamncakedodaicecreamncake 7:47 PM Jul 17th from UberTwitter

Been laying in this bed all day but now I’m alone, the studio stole my baby.. Csi reruns til its time to go to m2…or til the gonj calls 8:19 PM Jul 17th from UberTwitter

Now it’s really time for me to state my piece. First and foremost what is the first rule of Fight Club? Never talk about Fight Club! The same goes for the groupie/ jump off manual. NEVER talk about your rendezvous! DUH!

She wasn’t allowed to go to the studio? Wow. We’re in the studio with Trey all the time on Ustream and YOU couldn’t come? Wow. His fans have more "boo" status than you!HA! He’s not your boo he just wanted to sex you up. This is a desperate cry for attention from an immature little girl with daddy issues. Seriously, even if Trey was your man he wouldn’t tell us until the album drops. We know him better than you do. You’re a jump off not a girlfriend. You have no boo status, or any type of status. This is a shame that she put all of Trey’s alleged business out there on Front St. Why do I say “alleged” well she’s a 20 year old stripper/”model”. Come on now we all know that strippers aren’t too credible when it comes to celebrities. Trey’s career is finally blowing up and who wouldn’t want to be in that shine. What’s crazy to me is that Trey follows her on Twitter so I know he’s seen it. Trey hasn’t addressed the situation and he probably never will. That’s good because he won’t give the jump off the satisfaction of enjoying what she did. She emailed every online blogger that would listen and print the story. So not only is she putting her and Trey’s business out there, she’s also trying to become famous form it. That’s just disgusting and shameful. I don’t want to give her the satisfaction of glorifying what she did, so I’m not going to post her Twitter or her name and picture. She just killed any chance for me getting with Trey.She gives 20 year olds a bad image now!Well, I bet I know who her hero is. She’s studied from the “Queen of Jump Offs” Karrine Stefans very well. SMH.

~*~EvoL_1~*~

ROCK ON! Track of the Day

2009-07-22T23:04:00.000-04:00

The “ROCK ON! Track of the Day” is a semi oldie but goodie of our generation. Do ya’ll remember Craig David? He was that good looking British guy that came out with the song about the girl and how he can get her in seven days or something like that. It’s been a while since we’ve heard from Craig. I decided to post this song up after a Twitter conversation with my friend, fellow blogger, and TTU classmate Sabrina. (@Thinkin_ONPAPER & anomalythoughts.blogspot.com…check her out.) Well ladies and gentlemen I bring you “Fill Me In” by Craig David.ROCK ON!
~*~EvoL_1~*~

Craig David-"Fill Me In"